1 00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:15,049 ♪♪ [ Big Band ] 2 00:00:19,687 --> 00:00:22,156 Whee! Whee! 3 00:00:22,223 --> 00:00:25,226 Whoo! [ Cheering, Applause ] 4 00:00:29,397 --> 00:00:32,533 ♪ We girls of the chorus have a rocky road before us ♪ 5 00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:35,936 ♪ Theatrical history clearly discloses ♪ 6 00:00:36,003 --> 00:00:40,508 ♪ The life of a chorus girl is no bed of roses ♪ 7 00:00:55,589 --> 00:00:58,992 ♪ We girls of the chorus have a rocky road before us ♪ 8 00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:03,063 ♪ Kickin' around from town to town ♪ 9 00:01:03,131 --> 00:01:06,434 ♪ Boarding houses, cheap hotels Eating a lot of junk ♪ 10 00:01:06,500 --> 00:01:09,770 ♪ That grease paint pancake world of ours ♪ 11 00:01:09,837 --> 00:01:13,274 ♪ Is built on top of a wardrobe trunk ♪ 12 00:01:22,950 --> 00:01:26,787 ♪ We girls of the chorus have so many men adore us ♪ 13 00:01:26,854 --> 00:01:30,658 ♪ Adore us and implore us Goodness gracious how they bore us ♪ 14 00:01:30,724 --> 00:01:33,727 ♪ Stage-door Johnnys with romantic ambitions ♪ 15 00:01:33,794 --> 00:01:36,997 ♪ Their warm proposals are cold ♪ 16 00:01:37,064 --> 00:01:39,167 ♪ Propositions ♪♪ 17 00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:47,508 [ Applause ] 18 00:01:47,575 --> 00:01:49,143 [ Man ] Broadway "Jeannie" of the lamp. 19 00:01:49,210 --> 00:01:52,021 Last night at the Winter Garden opening of Mike Todd's Little Miss Mischief, 20 00:01:52,045 --> 00:01:54,348 little Miss Jeannie Laird stepped out of the chorus line... 21 00:01:54,415 --> 00:01:56,484 and into the spotlight to become an overnight star. 22 00:01:56,550 --> 00:01:58,552 She knocked them on their proverbial ear. 23 00:01:58,619 --> 00:02:00,788 Blasé hard-boiled first-nighters stood up and cheered, 24 00:02:00,854 --> 00:02:03,424 including your reporter. 25 00:02:05,559 --> 00:02:07,661 [ Chorus ] ♪ The Great White Way ♪ 26 00:02:07,728 --> 00:02:10,998 ♪ Love the temple of the Great White Way ♪ 27 00:02:11,064 --> 00:02:15,669 ♪ There is nothing in the world as gay as Broadway ♪ 28 00:02:15,736 --> 00:02:18,038 ♪ Unless it's London London ♪ 29 00:02:18,105 --> 00:02:23,811 ♪ Jolly old London at play ♪ 30 00:02:26,614 --> 00:02:29,116 ♪ There's bound to be ♪ 31 00:02:29,183 --> 00:02:32,320 ♪ Lots of gaiety in gay Paris ♪ 32 00:02:32,386 --> 00:02:34,422 ♪ But there's nothing like ♪ 33 00:02:34,488 --> 00:02:37,157 ♪ The temple of the street I love ♪ 34 00:02:37,225 --> 00:02:40,494 ♪ No matter where I roam ♪ 35 00:02:40,561 --> 00:02:42,963 ♪ For the Great White Way ♪ 36 00:02:43,030 --> 00:02:45,399 ♪ Is my home, sweet home ♪♪ 37 00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:08,289 ♪ Through all the years ♪ 38 00:03:08,356 --> 00:03:10,624 ♪ There was one little wish ♪ 39 00:03:10,691 --> 00:03:15,095 ♪ That I most highly prized ♪ 40 00:03:15,162 --> 00:03:18,399 ♪ And now at last ♪ 41 00:03:18,466 --> 00:03:22,703 ♪ At long, long last ♪ 42 00:03:22,770 --> 00:03:24,805 ♪ My wish is ♪ 43 00:03:24,872 --> 00:03:30,344 ♪ Fully realized ♪ 44 00:03:30,411 --> 00:03:34,315 ♪ Ho-hum, ho-hum ho-hum, ho-hum ♪ 45 00:03:34,382 --> 00:03:38,185 ♪ My wandering days are ever over ♪ 46 00:03:38,252 --> 00:03:42,089 ♪ I'm glad I lost the urge to roam ♪ 47 00:03:42,155 --> 00:03:46,594 ♪ Now I can give my dreams a permanent address ♪ 48 00:03:46,660 --> 00:03:50,598 ♪ And give my happiness a home ♪ 49 00:03:50,664 --> 00:03:54,167 [ Chorus ] ♪ Ho-hum, ho-hum ho-hum, ho-hum ♪ 50 00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:58,472 ♪ She's gonna give her dreams a permanent address ♪ 51 00:03:58,539 --> 00:04:02,142 ♪ And give her happiness a home ♪ 52 00:04:02,209 --> 00:04:04,745 Hold it, Miss Laird. Thank you very much, Miss Laird. 53 00:04:04,812 --> 00:04:06,814 Are you planning a show? How about the movies? 54 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:09,317 Wait a minute. Can you give us a story, Miss Laird? 55 00:04:09,383 --> 00:04:11,619 You bet I can. [ Together ] Quote? 56 00:04:11,685 --> 00:04:15,789 ♪ Got a quiet little place in the country ♪ 57 00:04:15,856 --> 00:04:19,793 ♪ Love the music of a front doorbell ♪ Sounds swell. 58 00:04:19,860 --> 00:04:23,931 ♪ It's a rambling paradise of just one story ♪ 59 00:04:23,997 --> 00:04:27,668 ♪ That's one story that I'm proud to tell ♪ 60 00:04:27,735 --> 00:04:31,672 ♪ Got a quiet little place in the country ♪ 61 00:04:31,739 --> 00:04:35,108 ♪ Got a neighbor droppin' in to chat ♪ Hold that! 62 00:04:35,175 --> 00:04:39,580 ♪ While a pretty kitty cat that I call Susan ♪ 63 00:04:39,647 --> 00:04:42,950 ♪ Lies a-snoozin' on the welcome mat ♪ 64 00:04:43,016 --> 00:04:47,087 ♪ I'm gonna gather my friends and bring 'em ♪ 65 00:04:47,154 --> 00:04:51,325 ♪ To a rustic cottage small ♪ 66 00:04:51,392 --> 00:04:55,329 ♪ Where I can swing my gingham ♪ 67 00:04:55,396 --> 00:04:58,832 ♪ And tack a funny picture on the wall ♪ 68 00:04:58,899 --> 00:05:02,736 ♪ With maybe one bush and one tree ♪ 69 00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:06,574 ♪ A shady picnic fun tree ♪ 70 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:10,378 ♪ Just a quiet little place in the country ♪ 71 00:05:10,444 --> 00:05:12,380 ♪ That's all ♪ [ Together ] No men? 72 00:05:12,446 --> 00:05:14,415 ♪ Ho-hum ♪♪ What then? 73 00:05:14,482 --> 00:05:17,751 That's all. Bye. 74 00:05:21,422 --> 00:05:23,524 Hey, Jeannie! Hello! Excuse me. 75 00:05:23,591 --> 00:05:26,193 Yoo-hoo! Honey! Honey, we're over here! 76 00:05:26,259 --> 00:05:29,463 [ Chattering ] 77 00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:31,732 Mmm. I didn't expect to see you here. 78 00:05:31,799 --> 00:05:35,302 After making that dough he's not gonna let you spend, why shouldn't he? He loves you! 79 00:05:35,369 --> 00:05:37,304 I'm here as a friend, not as a businessman. 80 00:05:37,371 --> 00:05:40,608 Besides sweet, how are you, Reed? Took a streetcar instead of a cab. 81 00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:43,210 Saved a buck. He feels great. Rosie, quit it, please. 82 00:05:43,276 --> 00:05:46,346 I'm not even gonna speak about money. I promised myself this morning. 83 00:05:46,414 --> 00:05:49,016 I just came down to help you through customs. That's fine, darling. 84 00:05:49,082 --> 00:05:51,719 Only? You didn't exactly stick to the budget I put you on. 85 00:05:51,785 --> 00:05:54,888 You didn't expect me to live on $10 a week in Paris, did you? 86 00:05:54,955 --> 00:05:57,858 Why not? Paris is no different than New York. It's just Frencher. 87 00:05:57,925 --> 00:06:00,260 Come on. I've arranged to have customs go through your bags. 88 00:06:00,327 --> 00:06:02,830 Yes, I know. That's wonderful. 89 00:06:02,896 --> 00:06:05,165 Rosie, you look great. Wonderful. Yeah? Hey! 90 00:06:05,232 --> 00:06:08,144 Wait till I inherit those clothes! Appleton, if you could dig what this costs, 91 00:06:08,168 --> 00:06:10,337 you'd get indigestion from the lunch you didn't buy me. 92 00:06:10,404 --> 00:06:12,105 How was London? Oh, wonderful. 93 00:06:12,172 --> 00:06:13,841 How was Paris? Very exciting. 94 00:06:13,907 --> 00:06:15,952 Was your performance at the Palladium sensational? Oh, yes. 95 00:06:15,976 --> 00:06:18,646 Some French postcards you sent. The Eiffel Tower-- Come on. 96 00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:22,349 You'll be happy I managed to unfreeze your pounds and francs, transfer them into dollars-- 97 00:06:22,416 --> 00:06:25,686 Never mind. There's only one thing I wanna know. How is my house? 98 00:06:25,753 --> 00:06:28,121 Oh, all right. Here it is. 99 00:06:28,188 --> 00:06:30,824 The bill of sale. Yours. Lock, stock and barrel. 100 00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:33,026 The barrel was wholesale. Mmm! 101 00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:37,898 121 Esplanade, Scarsdale, New York. Oh, it sounds good. 102 00:06:37,965 --> 00:06:41,001 This is all okay, Miss Laird. Thank you very much. Come on. Let's go. 103 00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:43,136 Oh, the keys. Thank you. 104 00:06:44,705 --> 00:06:47,541 Uh, I haven't been. I'm here already. 105 00:06:56,349 --> 00:06:58,586 Driver, take care of the bags, please. 106 00:07:01,154 --> 00:07:03,691 Well, how do you like it? Well, I didn't quite expect anything-- 107 00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:07,160 Did you ever see such a modern house? The last word. Really classical lines. 108 00:07:07,227 --> 00:07:09,196 So has Grant's Tomb. 109 00:07:17,204 --> 00:07:19,740 Frankenstein slept here. 110 00:07:23,210 --> 00:07:25,212 Electronic. 111 00:07:28,181 --> 00:07:32,185 [ Jeannie's Voice ] ♪ Just a quiet little place ♪ 112 00:07:32,252 --> 00:07:36,890 ♪ In the country ♪ 113 00:07:45,699 --> 00:07:48,936 ♪ There's a pretty kitty cat ♪ 114 00:07:49,002 --> 00:07:51,505 ♪ That I call Susan ♪ Watch. 115 00:07:51,572 --> 00:07:55,275 [ Jingling ] It works. 116 00:07:55,342 --> 00:07:59,012 Why? Well, it's supposed to represent the abstract of the, uh-- 117 00:07:59,079 --> 00:08:01,248 the, uh-- 118 00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:03,517 Well, it was expensive. 119 00:08:03,584 --> 00:08:09,657 ♪ Just a rustic cottage small ♪♪ 120 00:08:09,723 --> 00:08:12,059 What do you think of that? Swell. What is it? 121 00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:15,228 Flycatcher? It's a mobile by Seminovich Boroskowsky. 122 00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:17,607 Of course, you can't understand it, but it's a wonderful investment. 123 00:08:17,631 --> 00:08:21,134 I could sell that tomorrow at a profit if you got in trouble. Honey. 124 00:08:21,201 --> 00:08:24,404 Hmm? Get in trouble. 125 00:08:24,471 --> 00:08:27,040 Well, it's little things like this that make a house a home. 126 00:08:27,107 --> 00:08:29,242 What is this? That's a fireplace. 127 00:08:29,309 --> 00:08:31,845 Fireplace? Where's the chimney? Pyro-matic. Watch. 128 00:08:31,912 --> 00:08:34,481 Winter. 129 00:08:34,548 --> 00:08:37,050 Summer. 130 00:08:37,117 --> 00:08:40,087 Well, look around. Come on. Look around. Have you seen the patio? 131 00:08:41,321 --> 00:08:43,323 Oh, at least there's a bar. 132 00:08:43,390 --> 00:08:45,258 Yes, and it's custom-built. 133 00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:50,664 [ Gasps ] Is there something I can do for you? 134 00:08:50,731 --> 00:08:52,800 Oh, no. No, thanks. I was just looking, thanks. 135 00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:57,037 Are you a guest? Who, me? Oh, no, I'm the owner. This is mine. 136 00:08:57,104 --> 00:09:01,041 Who are you? Well, in that case, I am your general factotum. 137 00:09:01,108 --> 00:09:04,211 Oh. Hmm? Your butler, Miss Laird. 138 00:09:04,277 --> 00:09:07,180 My name is Samuels. Oh. 139 00:09:07,247 --> 00:09:10,083 Well, I guess we'll be seeing a lot of one another, huh? 140 00:09:10,150 --> 00:09:12,052 It's likely. 141 00:09:12,119 --> 00:09:14,187 It was nice to have met you, Samuels-- 142 00:09:14,254 --> 00:09:18,125 If there's anything that madam wishes, you may call me. 143 00:09:20,093 --> 00:09:22,663 I know, dear. Just one of those nights. 144 00:09:24,097 --> 00:09:26,166 So I said to him, "Listen, honey, let's face it. 145 00:09:26,233 --> 00:09:28,335 "You're about as sharp as a wet blotter. 146 00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:31,071 Every time you open your mouth, you put your foot in it." 147 00:09:31,138 --> 00:09:33,617 If you could do the same, sir, you'd spare the furniture considerably. 148 00:09:33,641 --> 00:09:36,209 You know, Rosie, I've been thinking about you, and I think-- 149 00:09:36,276 --> 00:09:38,345 Do you really have to wear these things, honestly? 150 00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:41,581 If you don't like 'em, I've got another pair. Oh? 151 00:09:42,650 --> 00:09:44,818 Huh? Yeah. 152 00:09:44,885 --> 00:09:46,787 Say, you know what you'd look good with? What? 153 00:09:46,854 --> 00:09:49,256 A Seeing Eye dog. Thanks. 154 00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:53,560 Oh, Pops, what are you wasting your time for? Gosh, I'm not your type. 155 00:09:53,627 --> 00:09:56,596 I'm just a happy slob, and I don't need a business manager. 156 00:09:56,664 --> 00:09:58,632 What you need is a husband. 157 00:09:58,699 --> 00:10:01,401 What I need is a drink. 158 00:10:01,468 --> 00:10:04,404 [ Dinging ] 159 00:10:04,471 --> 00:10:08,275 ♪ If I love you a mountain ♪ 160 00:10:08,341 --> 00:10:13,546 ♪ Can't you love me just a tiny hill ♪ 161 00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:18,285 ♪ If I love you a meadow ♪ 162 00:10:18,351 --> 00:10:23,156 ♪ Can't you love me just a daffodil ♪ 163 00:10:23,223 --> 00:10:28,195 ♪ If I need you a symphony ♪ 164 00:10:28,261 --> 00:10:32,265 ♪ To underscore the mood I'm in ♪ 165 00:10:32,332 --> 00:10:38,071 ♪ Can't you need me a serenade ♪ 166 00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:42,142 ♪ Played on a lonely violin ♪ 167 00:10:42,209 --> 00:10:47,414 ♪ If I want you the whole wide world ♪ 168 00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:51,651 ♪ Can't you want me just a lovers' lane ♪ 169 00:10:51,719 --> 00:10:55,956 ♪ If I miss you an ocean ♪ 170 00:10:56,023 --> 00:11:01,528 ♪ Can't you miss me just a drop of April rain ♪ 171 00:11:01,594 --> 00:11:05,999 ♪ Are you my forevermore ♪ 172 00:11:06,066 --> 00:11:10,003 ♪ Forevermore you are ♪ 173 00:11:10,070 --> 00:11:15,308 ♪ So if I love you all heaven ♪ 174 00:11:15,375 --> 00:11:17,577 ♪ Can't you love me ♪ 175 00:11:17,644 --> 00:11:23,016 ♪ Just an evening star ♪♪ 176 00:11:32,960 --> 00:11:35,695 Thanks. Uh-uh. Now wait a minute. 177 00:11:35,763 --> 00:11:38,031 It's going real good. Is it? 178 00:11:38,098 --> 00:11:41,538 It is indeed. So let's forget it for a minute and concentrate on your favorite producer. 179 00:11:42,836 --> 00:11:45,105 [ Screaming ] 180 00:11:48,141 --> 00:11:52,345 Oh! Oh, my goodness! What is this? Pigeons! 181 00:11:57,150 --> 00:12:00,320 Oh, for heaven sakes. Reed! Evelyn! 182 00:12:00,387 --> 00:12:03,390 Samuels! Somebody! Oh, look what they're doing! Look at that! 183 00:12:03,456 --> 00:12:06,093 What in the name of Dun and Bradstreet? I didn't arrange this. 184 00:12:06,159 --> 00:12:09,797 Yes, miss. You called me? Get him off of you. Get him off. 185 00:12:09,863 --> 00:12:12,065 It doesn't wish to go, miss. But whose are they? 186 00:12:12,132 --> 00:12:13,967 Who do they belong to? What do they want? 187 00:12:14,034 --> 00:12:17,237 They belong to the people next door. Do you wish me to lodge a complaint? 188 00:12:17,304 --> 00:12:20,140 Yes, if that's what it takes to get them to go home. Lodge it. 189 00:12:20,207 --> 00:12:22,285 [ Clears Throat ] Very well, madam. Look what they're doing. 190 00:12:22,309 --> 00:12:24,477 [ Screaming ] 191 00:12:24,544 --> 00:12:26,546 Now, take it easy. Oh! 192 00:12:26,613 --> 00:12:28,816 Shoo! Shoo! Get out of here! 193 00:12:28,882 --> 00:12:31,785 Jeannie, step right up and call me "birdbrain." 194 00:12:31,852 --> 00:12:35,188 [ People Chattering ] 195 00:12:42,963 --> 00:12:46,233 They're going back now. Fine. Samuels, what happened? 196 00:12:46,299 --> 00:12:48,535 I delivered an ultimatum, madam. I said, quote, 197 00:12:48,601 --> 00:12:51,671 "Either the birds take wing, or we shall dine on roast squab." 198 00:12:51,738 --> 00:12:54,474 There'll be no further incident. Thank heaven. Can we eat now? 199 00:12:54,541 --> 00:12:57,777 Very well, madam. Good. You must be starving, Harold. 200 00:12:58,946 --> 00:13:02,382 Uh, young man. ♪♪ [ Drumroll ] 201 00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:05,552 Supper is served! ♪♪ [ Big Band ] 202 00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:13,861 [ Coughing ] 203 00:13:13,927 --> 00:13:16,796 No, no, no! Samuels! Yes? 204 00:13:16,864 --> 00:13:21,068 Never mind. [ Coughs ] This time I'll lodge the complaint myself. 205 00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:23,837 Oh! [ Coughing ] 206 00:13:43,756 --> 00:13:46,159 I want to talk to somebody. 207 00:13:46,226 --> 00:13:48,428 [ Man ] What's holding you back? 208 00:13:50,297 --> 00:13:54,367 Nothing's holding me back except you. You murderers. 209 00:13:54,434 --> 00:13:57,737 Look, I've got a new house. I'm giving a party. I've got people. 210 00:13:57,804 --> 00:14:00,740 I've waited for years for the house, the party and the people, 211 00:14:00,807 --> 00:14:02,876 and you're wrecking it. 212 00:14:02,943 --> 00:14:05,012 First, we're set upon by pigeons. 213 00:14:05,078 --> 00:14:07,580 Then we're knocked on our rockers by cinders and fumes! 214 00:14:07,647 --> 00:14:11,184 And now-- Look! We're being smoked out like hams in a market. 215 00:14:11,251 --> 00:14:14,521 Well, it's got to stop, or else! 216 00:14:17,224 --> 00:14:20,493 Or else. Or else what? 217 00:14:38,678 --> 00:14:41,781 I-I didn't have to be so mean. 218 00:14:41,848 --> 00:14:44,084 Oh, well, you weren't so mean. 219 00:14:44,151 --> 00:14:46,719 I didn't have to yell at you. It's all right. 220 00:14:46,786 --> 00:14:48,755 Makes you feel better. 221 00:14:48,821 --> 00:14:53,193 Well, anyway, I'm sorry. We're sorry too... about your party. 222 00:14:53,260 --> 00:14:55,295 I think this thing has stopped smoking. 223 00:14:55,362 --> 00:14:58,065 Well, it was your fault in the first place. Joe. 224 00:14:58,131 --> 00:15:01,568 That's something you say before somebody says they're sorry, not after. 225 00:15:01,634 --> 00:15:03,636 Oh. 226 00:15:05,338 --> 00:15:08,708 That's an awful pretty dress. Thanks. 227 00:15:08,775 --> 00:15:11,811 Say, how is it my fault? You were making way too much-- 228 00:15:11,878 --> 00:15:15,448 Just technically. We were asleep and the music woke us up. It woke the pigeons up too. 229 00:15:15,515 --> 00:15:17,985 They got curious and decided to see what it was all about. 230 00:15:18,051 --> 00:15:22,089 Don't you worry. As soon as we have our hamburgers, we'll go right back to sleep. 231 00:15:22,155 --> 00:15:26,793 Want one? We only made four, and Benny, Lowlife and I have eaten ours. 232 00:15:26,859 --> 00:15:29,629 That's right. No point in being too neighborly too soon. 233 00:15:29,696 --> 00:15:32,565 - Want half? - No, thanks. 234 00:15:32,632 --> 00:15:34,968 - Can I have a rain check? - Sure, anytime. 235 00:15:35,035 --> 00:15:38,238 Our name's Carter. I'm Bill, this is Joe, and that's Lowlife. 236 00:15:38,305 --> 00:15:40,573 I'm Jeannie Laird. How do you do? 237 00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:44,011 How do. Nice party? 238 00:15:44,077 --> 00:15:46,946 Wonderful. Gee, I've got to get back to it. 239 00:15:47,014 --> 00:15:49,116 [ Barking ] 240 00:15:49,182 --> 00:15:51,384 Uh, nice Jeannie. Nice, nice. 241 00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:53,920 Listen, he's the one who's barking, not me. 242 00:15:53,987 --> 00:15:55,822 Shh. Nice Jeannie. [ Chuckles ] Sit down. 243 00:15:55,888 --> 00:15:58,225 Jeannie Laird, this is Benny the Dip. How do you do? 244 00:15:58,291 --> 00:16:00,727 Shh. I've got to go. 245 00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:10,037 Cold? Cold. 246 00:16:25,885 --> 00:16:29,156 That was a pretty sappy thing you said-- That was a pretty dress. 247 00:16:29,222 --> 00:16:31,358 Why? It was. All the same. 248 00:16:31,424 --> 00:16:33,760 It's a good thing we straightened up the house a little. 249 00:16:33,826 --> 00:16:36,963 [ Jeannie ] Hey. Hi. 250 00:16:37,030 --> 00:16:40,833 Tell me something. Do you always sleep out there in the yard? 251 00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:43,203 Quite often. 252 00:16:43,270 --> 00:16:45,905 Doesn't your wife mind? Haven't got one. 253 00:16:45,972 --> 00:16:48,508 - She's dead. - Oh, I'm sorry. 254 00:16:48,575 --> 00:16:51,978 It's all right. It happened a long time ago, when he was a very little boy. 255 00:16:52,045 --> 00:16:54,581 Who takes care of him? I take care of him. 256 00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:56,716 Well, I help a little. 257 00:16:56,783 --> 00:16:59,762 If there's anything wrong with his manners or the state of his neck, blame me. 258 00:16:59,786 --> 00:17:03,490 You mean, you live here all alone, just the two of you? 259 00:17:03,556 --> 00:17:07,494 Yes, the two of us. And the pigeons, Benny the Dip, Lowlife, 260 00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:10,297 Moe the toad, Pete the turtle, Freddy the frog... 261 00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:12,599 and there's two garter snakes we haven't named yet. 262 00:17:12,665 --> 00:17:16,103 - We haven't found out if they're boys or girls. - You forgot Binky. 263 00:17:16,169 --> 00:17:18,438 Yeah, I did. He's the canary upstairs. 264 00:17:18,505 --> 00:17:20,473 Oh. 265 00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:24,344 Well, good night. Good night. 266 00:17:30,283 --> 00:17:33,453 What's she being sorry for us for? 267 00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:36,055 Well, women always feel sorry for men without women. 268 00:17:36,123 --> 00:17:39,526 Why? You should see how it is in the other kids' houses where they do have 'em. 269 00:17:39,592 --> 00:17:41,761 You gotta eat when you're not hungry. 270 00:17:41,828 --> 00:17:45,064 You gotta take baths when you feel like staying dirty. It's pretty gruesome. 271 00:17:45,132 --> 00:17:48,168 They think it's good for your character to do things you don't wanna do. 272 00:17:48,235 --> 00:17:51,838 I'm surprised men live with women so much. 273 00:17:51,904 --> 00:17:53,873 How is my character? 274 00:17:53,940 --> 00:17:56,809 I like it. 275 00:17:56,876 --> 00:18:00,513 Well, then. She's got a lot of nerve feeling sorry for us, hasn't she? 276 00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:03,049 Yeah. 277 00:18:03,116 --> 00:18:05,285 You wouldn't want one around, would you, Dad? 278 00:18:05,352 --> 00:18:08,755 Me? Nah. Just clutter up the place. 279 00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:17,297 [ Dings ] ♪ I like to shoot a tin can target with a B.B. gun ♪ 280 00:18:18,231 --> 00:18:20,300 ♪ So do I ♪ 281 00:18:20,367 --> 00:18:22,569 ♪ Like father like son ♪ 282 00:18:22,635 --> 00:18:26,673 ♪ I like to pick the big black raisins off a hot cross bun ♪ 283 00:18:26,739 --> 00:18:28,575 ♪ So do I ♪ 284 00:18:28,641 --> 00:18:30,877 ♪ Like father like son ♪ 285 00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:34,447 ♪ Like to fish or swim or take a hike with you ♪ 286 00:18:34,514 --> 00:18:37,717 ♪ Wrestle, play catch or ride a bike with you ♪ 287 00:18:37,784 --> 00:18:40,086 ♪ Everything we like we like alike ♪ 288 00:18:40,153 --> 00:18:44,424 ♪ Excepting girls with whom I don't care to bother ♪ 289 00:18:44,491 --> 00:18:48,261 ♪ Like son like father ♪ 290 00:18:50,630 --> 00:18:53,800 ♪ I'd rather have a pal than a gal ♪ 291 00:18:53,866 --> 00:18:56,269 ♪ Anytime ♪ 292 00:18:58,438 --> 00:19:02,275 ♪ I'd rather have a chum than a pretty yummy-yum ♪ 293 00:19:02,342 --> 00:19:05,445 ♪ Anytime ♪ 294 00:19:05,512 --> 00:19:09,482 ♪ When a frail starts coyly grinnin' ♪ 295 00:19:09,549 --> 00:19:13,085 ♪ She's out to do some winnin' ♪ 296 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:15,488 ♪ And you know that a frail ♪ 297 00:19:15,555 --> 00:19:19,025 ♪ Is a synonym for trouble ♪ 298 00:19:19,091 --> 00:19:21,361 ♪ Double trouble ♪ 299 00:19:21,428 --> 00:19:24,364 ♪ I'd rather have a pal than a gal ♪ 300 00:19:24,431 --> 00:19:26,599 ♪ Anytime ♪ 301 00:19:28,335 --> 00:19:30,503 ♪ So if you're thinkin' damewise ♪ 302 00:19:30,570 --> 00:19:33,273 ♪ Play your game wise ♪ 303 00:19:33,340 --> 00:19:36,108 ♪ And give your thinkin' plenty of time ♪ 304 00:19:36,175 --> 00:19:39,679 ♪ Oh, of life I've made a study ♪ 305 00:19:39,746 --> 00:19:43,816 ♪ And I would rather have a buddy ♪ 306 00:19:43,883 --> 00:19:47,220 ♪ Than a female ♪ ♪ Fuddy-duddy ♪ 307 00:19:47,287 --> 00:19:49,456 ♪ Anytime ♪ 308 00:19:51,491 --> 00:19:55,328 ♪♪ [ Whistling ] 309 00:20:24,891 --> 00:20:28,761 ♪ Oh, of life I've made a study ♪ 310 00:20:28,828 --> 00:20:32,432 ♪ And I would rather have a buddy ♪ 311 00:20:32,499 --> 00:20:36,469 ♪ Than a female ♪ ♪ Fuddy-duddy ♪ 312 00:20:39,339 --> 00:20:43,343 [ Together ] ♪ Anytime ♪ 313 00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:56,323 ♪ Except when that moon is shinin' ♪ 314 00:20:57,924 --> 00:21:01,828 ♪ And a lonely heart is pinin' ♪ 315 00:21:03,563 --> 00:21:08,301 ♪ Then I'd rather have a gal than a pal ♪ 316 00:21:09,402 --> 00:21:11,404 ♪ Anytime ♪ 317 00:21:11,471 --> 00:21:13,640 ♪ Anytime ♪♪ 318 00:21:16,676 --> 00:21:18,678 Anytime. 319 00:21:25,618 --> 00:21:27,887 Maybe we ought to do one on the piano. All right. 320 00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:31,591 [ Man ] Up on the piano. [ Jeannie ] Okay. 321 00:21:31,658 --> 00:21:34,226 - Ah, that's pretty. - All right? 322 00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:37,196 China up. Just a hair. That's all! 323 00:21:37,263 --> 00:21:40,433 ♪♪ [ Piano Continues ] 324 00:21:40,500 --> 00:21:43,703 [ Chattering ] 325 00:21:45,338 --> 00:21:48,074 - Hey! Hold it, Jeannie! - Okay. 326 00:21:48,140 --> 00:21:51,978 Hold. Well-- [ Laughs ] Will you be home for dinner this evening, Miss Laird? 327 00:21:52,044 --> 00:21:54,814 No, I'm dining out tonight. Excellent, Miss Laird. 328 00:21:54,881 --> 00:21:58,385 And, Samuels? Would you please fix some coffee for the boys? 329 00:21:58,451 --> 00:22:00,520 Jeannie. Uh, if you wish, madam. 330 00:22:02,489 --> 00:22:05,825 Mr. Fields wants to know if you'll meet him at 21 at 6:00? Yes, fine. 331 00:22:05,892 --> 00:22:09,061 And you've read the Bayberry Room contract? Yes, the terms are just swell. 332 00:22:09,128 --> 00:22:11,464 [ Man ] Let's have a little action now, Jeannie. 333 00:22:11,531 --> 00:22:13,900 Whoop. Sorry. Watch it, Tarzan. 334 00:22:13,966 --> 00:22:17,370 What's the matter? I had a little accident last night. 335 00:22:17,437 --> 00:22:19,439 Ran into a fifth of scotch. Hungover? 336 00:22:19,506 --> 00:22:21,641 And back. Ah. 337 00:22:21,708 --> 00:22:24,411 What's with you? Well, I'm Bill Carter from next door. 338 00:22:24,477 --> 00:22:27,079 W-With the pigeons and the Indian smoke signals? 339 00:22:27,146 --> 00:22:29,181 Guilty. 340 00:22:29,248 --> 00:22:35,021 Hey, Jeannie. Look what flew over the wall-- the keeper of the zoo. 341 00:22:35,087 --> 00:22:37,990 Samuels will give you some coffee, boys. I'll be right back. 342 00:22:38,057 --> 00:22:40,292 That's a very good stock. The market is very bullish. 343 00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:42,294 Hi. Hi there. How are you? 344 00:22:42,361 --> 00:22:45,131 What can I do for you? I'll leave before he answers that. 345 00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:48,000 Oh. I've kind of an embarrassing question to ask you. 346 00:22:48,067 --> 00:22:50,670 Oh, I didn't think there were any left. See, I do a strip. 347 00:22:50,737 --> 00:22:52,872 What? I do a strip. 348 00:22:52,939 --> 00:22:55,708 I guess I heard you the first time. Oh. Oh, no. 349 00:22:55,775 --> 00:22:58,344 This is for the comics. You know, for the Express. 350 00:22:58,411 --> 00:23:00,379 Oh. Funnies. 351 00:23:00,447 --> 00:23:04,116 What I thought you meant was pretty funny too. Yeah, I can see that. 352 00:23:04,183 --> 00:23:07,654 Well, anyway, it's all about Joe and me and the whole neighborhood, 353 00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:09,656 and I'd like to use you in it. 354 00:23:09,722 --> 00:23:12,224 Me? Oh. Well, how? 355 00:23:12,291 --> 00:23:17,129 Well, the subject is "Who has bought the house next door?" 356 00:23:17,196 --> 00:23:19,398 Demons? [ Shudders ] No. 357 00:23:19,466 --> 00:23:21,501 Goblins? No. 358 00:23:21,568 --> 00:23:24,103 Giants? No! [ Laughing ] 359 00:23:24,170 --> 00:23:27,139 Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present to you the only jet-propelled... 360 00:23:27,206 --> 00:23:29,909 fairy princess in captivity. 361 00:23:31,377 --> 00:23:34,614 Oh, isn't that darling? 362 00:23:34,681 --> 00:23:36,849 But why am I jet-propelled? 363 00:23:36,916 --> 00:23:39,318 Well, it's 'cause everything you do is so fast. You know-- 364 00:23:39,385 --> 00:23:42,722 Whoo! You're here. Ffft! You're there. 365 00:23:42,789 --> 00:23:44,867 Do you always work that hard? You haven't seen anything. 366 00:23:44,891 --> 00:23:47,159 You should see me on a normal day. 367 00:23:47,226 --> 00:23:50,830 Like this coming Monday. I start rehearsals in the morning for a new show, 368 00:23:50,897 --> 00:23:53,866 and at night I open at the Bayberry Room for a week. 369 00:23:53,933 --> 00:23:57,069 What a life. What do you mean? I love it. 370 00:23:57,136 --> 00:24:01,541 Besides, everybody works. Why, I'll bet you draw millions of these every day. 371 00:24:01,608 --> 00:24:04,511 No. Just four little boxes just that big. 372 00:24:04,577 --> 00:24:07,346 What do you do with the rest of your time? You must be kidding. 373 00:24:07,413 --> 00:24:09,415 No. I have a son. 374 00:24:09,482 --> 00:24:13,085 He uses up all his time using up all my time. Have you ever been a father? 375 00:24:13,152 --> 00:24:16,989 No, I haven't. Well, it's a full-time job, believe me. 376 00:24:17,056 --> 00:24:20,059 You see, there's talks. There's games and school. 377 00:24:20,126 --> 00:24:22,562 Then there's the proper use of the "T" formation. 378 00:24:22,629 --> 00:24:24,564 How to keep your left hand up high. 379 00:24:24,631 --> 00:24:28,367 And then, of course, the art and science of washing behind the ears. 380 00:24:28,434 --> 00:24:30,603 Right now we're planning a vacation. 381 00:24:30,670 --> 00:24:34,574 You need a vacation from one little boy and four little boxes a day? 382 00:24:34,641 --> 00:24:39,378 Everybody needs a vacation. You ought to try one. Oh, I don't need one. 383 00:24:39,445 --> 00:24:43,115 ♪♪ [ Whistling ] 384 00:24:44,416 --> 00:24:46,385 What do you do for fun? I work. 385 00:24:46,452 --> 00:24:49,689 You call that fun? Try it. 386 00:24:54,594 --> 00:24:57,630 Well, you're doin' all right. 387 00:24:57,697 --> 00:25:00,466 ♪ Dee-doodly do, do, do, do ♪ 388 00:25:00,533 --> 00:25:03,803 ♪ Dee-doodly do, do, do, do, do, do ♪ 389 00:25:05,972 --> 00:25:08,841 ♪ Well, well, well You're doin' all right ♪ 390 00:25:08,908 --> 00:25:12,812 Now wait a minute. Wait a minute! 391 00:25:12,879 --> 00:25:15,114 This dress is much too expensive for you. 392 00:25:15,181 --> 00:25:17,249 ♪ Quite true ♪ 393 00:25:17,316 --> 00:25:20,553 ♪ Quite true ♪ 394 00:25:20,620 --> 00:25:25,357 ♪ There's an old, old saying which clearly paints my point of view ♪ 395 00:25:25,424 --> 00:25:28,895 ♪ There are many, many things that folks do need ♪ 396 00:25:28,961 --> 00:25:31,798 But they don't need as much as they think they do. 397 00:25:31,864 --> 00:25:35,134 ♪ They measure their luck by that extra buck ♪ 398 00:25:35,201 --> 00:25:38,304 ♪ Better known as folding green ♪ 399 00:25:38,370 --> 00:25:41,741 ♪ Do you want me to draw you a picture ♪ 400 00:25:41,808 --> 00:25:45,511 ♪ Or do you know just what I mean ♪ 401 00:25:45,578 --> 00:25:49,248 ♪ Quite true Quite true ♪ 402 00:25:49,315 --> 00:25:53,552 ♪ You don't need as much as you think you do ♪ 403 00:25:55,287 --> 00:25:58,357 ♪ You've got an old hat You got an old suit ♪ 404 00:25:58,424 --> 00:26:01,694 ♪ You got your rent ♪ ♪ And enough for a sip and a bite ♪ 405 00:26:01,761 --> 00:26:03,830 ♪ Dee-doodly do, do, do, do ♪ 406 00:26:03,896 --> 00:26:07,066 ♪ You're doin' all right ♪ 407 00:26:07,133 --> 00:26:10,236 ♪ You got a new house You got a new car ♪ 408 00:26:10,302 --> 00:26:13,572 ♪ I've got a brand new moon that's shining so bright ♪ 409 00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:15,708 ♪ Dee-doodly do, do, do, do ♪ 410 00:26:15,775 --> 00:26:19,278 ♪ You're doin' all right ♪ 411 00:26:19,345 --> 00:26:22,882 ♪ You can say what you wanna say Pray where you wanna pray ♪ 412 00:26:22,949 --> 00:26:25,618 ♪ Find your place in the sun ♪ 413 00:26:25,685 --> 00:26:28,187 Just take a little and leave a little. 414 00:26:28,254 --> 00:26:31,991 ♪ There's plenty for everyone ♪ 415 00:26:34,226 --> 00:26:37,296 ♪ You've got an old joke ♪ ♪ You got an old song ♪ 416 00:26:37,363 --> 00:26:40,166 ♪ You got a friend or two around on a Saturday night ♪ 417 00:26:40,232 --> 00:26:43,903 ♪ And if you do what you're doin' real well ♪ 418 00:26:49,275 --> 00:26:52,611 ♪ Well You're doin' all right ♪ 419 00:26:52,679 --> 00:26:55,614 ♪ Dee-doodly do, do, do, do ♪ 420 00:26:55,682 --> 00:26:57,784 ♪ Dee-doodly do, do, do, do, do, do ♪ 421 00:26:57,850 --> 00:27:01,220 ♪ Come on We're goin' dancin' ♪ 422 00:27:01,287 --> 00:27:04,190 ♪ What's that You say you won't ♪ 423 00:27:04,256 --> 00:27:07,694 What do you mean? You can't afford it? 424 00:27:07,760 --> 00:27:10,529 ♪ New shoes pinch ♪ [ Together ] ♪ But old shoes don't ♪ 425 00:27:10,596 --> 00:27:13,199 ♪ Come on Forget your troubles ♪ 426 00:27:13,265 --> 00:27:16,368 ♪ 'Tain't worth a bag of beans ♪ 427 00:27:16,435 --> 00:27:19,171 ♪ That jingle in your heart ♪ 428 00:27:19,238 --> 00:27:23,776 ♪ Means more than the jingle in your jeans ♪ 429 00:27:23,843 --> 00:27:27,747 ♪ You got an old suit You got an old hat ♪ 430 00:27:32,618 --> 00:27:36,022 ♪ You're doin' all right ♪ 431 00:27:36,088 --> 00:27:40,359 ♪ And if you do what you're doin' real well ♪ 432 00:27:40,426 --> 00:27:44,764 ♪ And if you do what you're doin' real well ♪ 433 00:27:44,831 --> 00:27:48,901 ♪ And if you do what you're doin' real well ♪ 434 00:27:48,968 --> 00:27:53,840 ♪ Well, well You're doin' all right ♪♪ 435 00:27:57,609 --> 00:28:00,512 [ Laughing ] Well, that was fun. What do we do now? 436 00:28:00,579 --> 00:28:03,549 I never knew I had two left feet. Hey, Rosie, did ya see me? 437 00:28:03,615 --> 00:28:06,052 Do you wanna make a career out of it? No, thanks. 438 00:28:06,118 --> 00:28:08,187 I think I'd better stick to my funny papers. 439 00:28:08,254 --> 00:28:10,422 Maybe I can teach you somethin' sometime. Maybe so. 440 00:28:10,489 --> 00:28:12,491 You forgot your sketch. That's yours. You keep it. 441 00:28:12,558 --> 00:28:16,796 Oh, thank you. Are you leaving on your vacation soon? 442 00:28:16,863 --> 00:28:21,200 Well, pretty soon. Not right away though. Why? 443 00:28:22,634 --> 00:28:24,871 Just asking. Oh. 444 00:28:24,937 --> 00:28:28,875 Well, so long. I had fun. Bye. 445 00:29:00,539 --> 00:29:02,574 Hi! Hi there. 446 00:29:02,641 --> 00:29:05,411 Can I cash in my rain check? Sure. What rain check? 447 00:29:05,477 --> 00:29:08,347 Remember the half a hamburger you offered me the other night? Oh, sure. 448 00:29:08,414 --> 00:29:11,984 Well, I'm starved. My butler just gave me the creeps. 449 00:29:12,051 --> 00:29:14,153 We're gonna eat inside by the fire. It's chilly here. 450 00:29:14,220 --> 00:29:16,322 Go set another place when you take that salad in. 451 00:29:16,388 --> 00:29:19,091 Joe, isn't that a Caesar salad? Yeah. 452 00:29:19,158 --> 00:29:23,963 Mmm. Don't tell me a little boy like you knows how to make one? 453 00:29:27,599 --> 00:29:32,905 He's just figuring how much you'll eat and deducting it from his share. That's all. 454 00:29:32,972 --> 00:29:35,041 Why do you have a creepy butler? Don't be silly. 455 00:29:35,107 --> 00:29:39,045 Why do you think I worked so hard to get somewhere if not to have a creepy butler? 456 00:29:39,111 --> 00:29:41,351 As much fun as you'd thought it'd be? You're darn tootin'. 457 00:29:41,413 --> 00:29:44,116 That's not the right answer. Now that you are somewhere, 458 00:29:44,183 --> 00:29:46,418 why, you're supposed to find it empty. 459 00:29:46,485 --> 00:29:48,754 Your heart is breaking. You'd give anything to be back... 460 00:29:48,821 --> 00:29:51,090 in that little cold-water walk-up flat again. 461 00:29:51,157 --> 00:29:53,692 Not me, neighbor. I love every minute of it. 462 00:29:53,759 --> 00:29:56,295 No broken heart, huh? Who's got time? 463 00:29:56,362 --> 00:29:59,498 You have time to baste these? Sure. Glad to. 464 00:29:59,565 --> 00:30:01,567 What's baste? 465 00:30:15,414 --> 00:30:17,950 Heads. Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk. 466 00:30:18,017 --> 00:30:20,719 Two out of three? Get out. 467 00:30:20,786 --> 00:30:23,755 You sure this is on the level? You've won the last five times. 468 00:30:23,822 --> 00:30:26,125 Oh, I'll help you. No. You let him do 'em. 469 00:30:26,192 --> 00:30:28,360 No sense in you both being miserable. 470 00:30:28,427 --> 00:30:31,363 Still can't get over you two doing everything for yourselves. 471 00:30:31,430 --> 00:30:33,532 Do you know how to plan his meals, make him wash-- 472 00:30:33,599 --> 00:30:35,634 [ Chuckles ] What's so funny about that? 473 00:30:35,701 --> 00:30:38,170 Those are things women do. That's why we have our motto. 474 00:30:38,237 --> 00:30:40,239 Joe-- Women are fine, but not in the home. 475 00:30:40,306 --> 00:30:43,442 You're just like all the rest. She's prettier. 476 00:30:43,509 --> 00:30:46,145 There was nothing chintzy about that redhead you used to know. 477 00:30:46,212 --> 00:30:49,548 Get with the dishes. Remind me later to have a talk about the birds and bees. 478 00:30:49,615 --> 00:30:51,617 Again? 479 00:30:53,285 --> 00:30:55,321 I hope you didn't take our little motto personally. 480 00:30:55,387 --> 00:30:58,124 Personally? Me? 481 00:30:58,190 --> 00:31:00,826 Oh, sure. I was planning to move in any day now. 482 00:31:00,893 --> 00:31:03,429 Uh-uh. Not until you learn how to cook. 483 00:31:16,075 --> 00:31:18,477 Can I help you? No. 484 00:31:18,544 --> 00:31:22,648 Can I stay here and talk to you? No. 485 00:31:22,714 --> 00:31:25,851 Can I just watch you? No. 486 00:31:25,918 --> 00:31:28,254 Okay. 487 00:31:33,292 --> 00:31:35,727 Now just follow me, Jeannie. Don't try to lead. 488 00:31:35,794 --> 00:31:39,631 It's pretty simple once you get the hang of it. You stinker. 489 00:31:39,698 --> 00:31:41,600 [ Joe ] I'm finished. 490 00:31:44,703 --> 00:31:47,806 What do we do now? You want to see my animals? I'd love to, but-- 491 00:31:47,873 --> 00:31:50,842 Let's play drawades. "Drawades"? Sounds like a drink. 492 00:31:50,909 --> 00:31:55,047 Oh, no, it's like charades, only you have to guess a story from a sketch I draw. 493 00:31:55,114 --> 00:31:57,549 Wanna try it? Yes. 494 00:31:57,616 --> 00:32:00,452 All right. Ready? Uh-huh. 495 00:32:00,519 --> 00:32:03,022 Once upon a time-- 496 00:32:03,089 --> 00:32:05,992 - there was a little girl. - Yeah. 497 00:32:07,793 --> 00:32:10,696 - And she had red hair. - Nah. 498 00:32:10,762 --> 00:32:12,798 - Blonde? - Getting warmer. 499 00:32:12,864 --> 00:32:14,733 Platinum blonde? You're getting hot. 500 00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:17,503 Goldilocks. "Goldilocks and the Three Bears." Bingo. 501 00:32:17,569 --> 00:32:20,939 Of course that was a snap. Why don't we try something hard now, huh? 502 00:32:21,007 --> 00:32:24,043 I'd love to, Joe, but I have an early call tomorrow. Next time, huh? 503 00:32:24,110 --> 00:32:26,012 Okay. We'll boost you over the wall. 504 00:32:26,078 --> 00:32:28,280 All right. 505 00:32:29,982 --> 00:32:32,418 I said we. Hmm? 506 00:32:37,990 --> 00:32:40,726 [ Chuckles ] This is where I came in. Yeah. 507 00:32:40,792 --> 00:32:44,130 A few more rain checks, we'll have to build a gate in here. I had fun. 508 00:32:44,196 --> 00:32:45,764 So did we. Good night. 509 00:32:45,831 --> 00:32:47,366 Good night. Good night, Joe. 510 00:32:47,433 --> 00:32:50,069 Good night. 511 00:32:50,136 --> 00:32:52,438 You know, I'm going to buy you a new suit. 512 00:32:52,504 --> 00:32:55,107 What color? Blue serge, just like mine. 513 00:32:55,174 --> 00:32:58,044 Sounds like "go visiting relatives" suits to me. 514 00:32:58,110 --> 00:33:01,256 I'm thinking about broadening your horizons. I'm gonna take you on the town Monday night. 515 00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:03,449 Where? Tell you later. 516 00:33:03,515 --> 00:33:06,261 Lots of times when people have things they won't tell you till later... 517 00:33:06,285 --> 00:33:09,221 it's 'cause they're too horrible to tell you now! 518 00:33:12,158 --> 00:33:15,427 ♪♪ [ Big Band ] 519 00:33:41,820 --> 00:33:45,991 ♪♪ [ Fanfare ] 520 00:33:46,058 --> 00:33:48,394 Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Jeannie Laird. 521 00:34:02,108 --> 00:34:07,446 [ Bell Chiming ] 522 00:34:32,871 --> 00:34:36,175 ♪ It's 3:00 a.m. ♪ 523 00:34:36,242 --> 00:34:41,180 ♪ What happened to my pride again ♪ 524 00:34:41,247 --> 00:34:44,516 ♪ It died again ♪ 525 00:34:44,583 --> 00:34:48,387 ♪ Trying to get somewhere ♪ 526 00:34:48,454 --> 00:34:53,091 ♪ Somewhere with a nowhere guy ♪ 527 00:34:54,059 --> 00:34:57,196 ♪ It's crazy, crazy ♪ 528 00:34:58,297 --> 00:35:01,533 ♪ It's 4:00 a.m. ♪ 529 00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:06,405 ♪ Oh, yes, I'm losing sleep again ♪ 530 00:35:06,472 --> 00:35:10,176 ♪ In deep again ♪ 531 00:35:10,242 --> 00:35:13,445 ♪ Trying to get somewhere ♪ 532 00:35:13,512 --> 00:35:19,385 ♪ Somewhere with a nowhere guy ♪ 533 00:35:19,451 --> 00:35:22,421 ♪ Here am I like a fool ♪ 534 00:35:22,488 --> 00:35:24,790 ♪ Just listenin' ♪ 535 00:35:24,856 --> 00:35:27,259 ♪ Just listenin' for those footsteps ♪ 536 00:35:27,326 --> 00:35:30,896 ♪ Down the hall ♪ 537 00:35:30,962 --> 00:35:36,302 ♪ Just talking to those shadows on the wall ♪ 538 00:35:36,368 --> 00:35:39,671 ♪ And telling them this can't go on ♪ 539 00:35:39,738 --> 00:35:42,408 ♪ That's all I'm through ♪ 540 00:35:42,474 --> 00:35:47,179 ♪ For good Forever ♪ 541 00:35:49,248 --> 00:35:52,184 ♪ Then he'll walk in ♪ 542 00:35:52,251 --> 00:35:54,353 ♪ He'll smile ♪ 543 00:35:54,420 --> 00:35:57,189 ♪ And I'll forgive again ♪ 544 00:35:57,256 --> 00:36:01,927 ♪ And I'll live again ♪ 545 00:36:01,993 --> 00:36:04,363 ♪ Why don't I leave him ♪ 546 00:36:04,430 --> 00:36:06,765 ♪ Oh, it makes no sense ♪ 547 00:36:06,832 --> 00:36:11,537 ♪ To even try ♪ 548 00:36:12,804 --> 00:36:15,274 ♪ He's just ♪ 549 00:36:15,341 --> 00:36:19,745 ♪ A nowhere ♪ 550 00:36:19,811 --> 00:36:23,982 ♪ But without him ♪ 551 00:36:24,049 --> 00:36:28,487 ♪ So am I ♪ 552 00:37:18,270 --> 00:37:23,309 ♪♪ [ Continues ] 553 00:37:45,297 --> 00:37:47,466 [ Whistle Blows ] 554 00:37:51,002 --> 00:37:53,439 [ Knocking Continues ] 555 00:37:53,505 --> 00:37:55,674 [ Whistle Blows ] 556 00:38:02,481 --> 00:38:05,050 [ Whistle Blows ] 557 00:38:06,485 --> 00:38:08,787 [ Whistle Blows ] 558 00:38:17,262 --> 00:38:19,431 [ Whistle Blows ] 559 00:38:26,505 --> 00:38:28,874 [ Whistle Blows ] 560 00:38:32,478 --> 00:38:34,780 [ Whistle Blows ] 561 00:40:22,621 --> 00:40:27,459 [ Siren Wailing ] 562 00:40:38,504 --> 00:40:41,840 [ Siren Fades ] 563 00:40:42,808 --> 00:40:45,376 ♪ Why don't I leave him ♪ 564 00:40:45,443 --> 00:40:47,412 ♪ Oh, it makes no sense ♪ 565 00:40:47,479 --> 00:40:51,282 ♪ To even try ♪ 566 00:40:51,349 --> 00:40:56,454 ♪ He's just a nowhere ♪ 567 00:40:56,522 --> 00:41:00,291 ♪ But without him ♪ 568 00:41:00,358 --> 00:41:04,830 ♪ So am I ♪♪ 569 00:41:42,300 --> 00:41:45,003 [ Feet Tapping ] 570 00:41:46,672 --> 00:41:51,142 [ Feet Tapping Continues ] 571 00:41:58,149 --> 00:42:03,889 "Bake, blend, braise, broil. Baste." 572 00:42:03,955 --> 00:42:08,827 "Baste: To moisten food by spooning liquid over a surface." 573 00:42:24,175 --> 00:42:27,478 How you doin'? Okay. How you doin'? 574 00:42:27,545 --> 00:42:29,615 Sure are a lot of things we need. Yeah. 575 00:42:29,681 --> 00:42:32,483 When are we going? Going where? 576 00:42:32,550 --> 00:42:34,853 To the North Woods-- Canada. 577 00:42:34,920 --> 00:42:38,023 North Woods-- Tomorrow. 578 00:42:38,089 --> 00:42:40,191 That's great. Tomorrow morning. 579 00:42:40,258 --> 00:42:42,560 I heard you. A man can get ridiculous, you know. 580 00:42:43,895 --> 00:42:46,397 It'll be just what I need. Get the cobwebs out. 581 00:42:46,464 --> 00:42:50,535 You feel okay? Sure, I feel okay. You better hit the sack. 582 00:42:50,602 --> 00:42:52,771 Come on, Benny. 583 00:44:06,644 --> 00:44:11,182 Oh, isn't this awful? Well, you can't go through your whole life without some trouble. 584 00:44:22,393 --> 00:44:25,430 Come on, Dad. Wake up. Wake up. Come on. 585 00:44:25,496 --> 00:44:29,634 Come on. Come on. Get down. 586 00:44:29,701 --> 00:44:33,171 Where you going? We're going to the North Woods-- Canada. You said so. 587 00:44:33,238 --> 00:44:35,406 What time is it? Well, it's almost 6:00. 588 00:44:35,473 --> 00:44:37,642 [ Groans ] Oh, come on. I've made breakfast... 589 00:44:37,709 --> 00:44:39,711 and packed the animals and me and you too. 590 00:44:39,778 --> 00:44:41,980 We're all ready. 591 00:44:43,448 --> 00:44:46,317 Joe, uh-- 592 00:44:46,384 --> 00:44:48,486 But you said so. Yeah. 593 00:44:48,553 --> 00:44:53,158 But, uh, Joe, last night I decided to syndicate the strip. 594 00:44:53,224 --> 00:44:58,696 You know what that means. It'll be in a lot more papers and lot more people will see it. 595 00:44:58,764 --> 00:45:02,100 Of course, there's a few things I have to do. Take a couple of days. 596 00:45:02,167 --> 00:45:04,202 Well, it won't take too long? 597 00:45:04,269 --> 00:45:07,172 Oh, no. A few days. A week at the most. 598 00:45:07,238 --> 00:45:09,707 We will be going. Sure, we're going. 599 00:45:09,775 --> 00:45:12,844 'Cause you said so in the strip that we'd be going, and you said... 600 00:45:12,911 --> 00:45:16,447 we'd be sending stuff back from Canada, and we can't do that if we're not there. 601 00:45:16,514 --> 00:45:19,317 And then it wouldn't be true, and our strip is true. 602 00:45:23,188 --> 00:45:27,192 Yeah, that's right, Joe. Okay. 603 00:45:30,862 --> 00:45:33,031 Joe? Yeah? 604 00:45:33,098 --> 00:45:36,201 - Not sore, are you? - Heck, no. 605 00:45:36,267 --> 00:45:38,636 It's just as bad for you as it is for me. 606 00:45:38,703 --> 00:45:40,906 Yeah. 607 00:45:56,855 --> 00:45:59,190 [ Doorbell Rings ] 608 00:46:00,859 --> 00:46:03,862 Hi, Joe. Oh, hi. 609 00:46:03,929 --> 00:46:07,465 Somebody sick? Oh, no, uh-- [ Chuckles ] 610 00:46:07,532 --> 00:46:12,303 Joe, I'd like to have you meet Evelyn. Evelyn, this is Joe. 611 00:46:12,370 --> 00:46:15,040 [ In British Accent ] Good evening, Master Joseph. 612 00:46:15,106 --> 00:46:18,143 [ In British Accent ] Master Joseph? 613 00:46:18,209 --> 00:46:20,278 Hi there. [ Jeannie ] Hi. 614 00:46:21,847 --> 00:46:24,282 Hey, you goin' someplace? Didn't you tell him? 615 00:46:24,349 --> 00:46:26,617 Oh, I've been so busy I didn't get a chance. 616 00:46:26,684 --> 00:46:29,487 Joe, you know the syndication thing, that was Jeannie's idea. 617 00:46:29,554 --> 00:46:32,394 I wanna talk to her about it. The only chance she's got is between shows, 618 00:46:32,423 --> 00:46:34,425 so I thought I'd go into town with her. 619 00:46:34,492 --> 00:46:37,162 Yes, and Evelyn is going to stay with you. 620 00:46:38,263 --> 00:46:41,732 You mean you got me a babysitter? 621 00:46:41,799 --> 00:46:43,902 Let me talk to you. 622 00:46:45,803 --> 00:46:48,073 She can cook, can't she? Yeah. 623 00:46:49,607 --> 00:46:53,144 What about washing the dishes? I get you. Yeah, sure! 624 00:46:53,211 --> 00:46:55,313 You don't mind at all, do you? No, not at all. 625 00:46:55,380 --> 00:46:58,116 You guys better be hittin' the road. Yes, it's getting late. 626 00:46:58,183 --> 00:47:00,551 See you later, sport. 627 00:47:00,618 --> 00:47:04,990 [ Laughing ] Well, hi, buster. 628 00:47:05,056 --> 00:47:07,058 Hi there. Well, hello, Bill. 629 00:47:07,125 --> 00:47:09,194 How's my dancin' partner? Just bullish. 630 00:47:09,260 --> 00:47:11,196 How ya doin' with our girl? None of your business. 631 00:47:11,262 --> 00:47:13,331 At least he isn't a kiss-and-tell, huh? 632 00:47:13,398 --> 00:47:15,433 She'll be right out. She's almost through changing. 633 00:47:15,500 --> 00:47:17,903 Say, does Jeannie ever complain of a certain lack of privacy? 634 00:47:17,969 --> 00:47:19,837 She never seemed to need any, up to now. 635 00:47:19,905 --> 00:47:22,207 That's what makes you so interesting. [ Jeannie ] Hi, Bill. 636 00:47:22,273 --> 00:47:24,375 Hiya, Jeannie. Didn't take too long, did I? 637 00:47:24,442 --> 00:47:27,178 Yeah, but it was worth it. Rosie and I are goin' up to Harlem. 638 00:47:27,245 --> 00:47:29,247 I've got a great idea. Why don't you join us? 639 00:47:29,314 --> 00:47:31,549 Liked your first idea better. Why don't you two go? 640 00:47:31,616 --> 00:47:34,128 You wanted me to talk to Bill about syndicating his cartoon strip. 641 00:47:34,152 --> 00:47:36,221 That's right. Maybe we'll join you later. 642 00:47:36,287 --> 00:47:40,191 Come on, honey. I think they want us to be alone. 643 00:47:40,258 --> 00:47:42,393 Come on. Let's go count your money, huh? 644 00:47:45,096 --> 00:47:47,899 Okay? I think you handled that very diplomatically. 645 00:47:47,966 --> 00:47:49,968 Thank you. Just about like a steam shovel. 646 00:47:50,035 --> 00:47:52,303 [ Chuckles ] Got the same results. Yep. 647 00:47:52,370 --> 00:47:54,940 Well, what'll we do? Why don't we try being alone again? 648 00:47:55,006 --> 00:47:57,308 All right. Where? Here. 649 00:47:57,375 --> 00:48:00,578 Here? Oh, but the place is all closed up. 650 00:48:00,645 --> 00:48:03,949 What do you have when you're open? Just a lot of people and some music. 651 00:48:04,015 --> 00:48:07,552 And we don't want the people. No, but we do need the music. 652 00:48:07,618 --> 00:48:09,620 Yes, we do. 653 00:48:18,796 --> 00:48:23,068 ♪♪ [ Orchestral, Loud ] 654 00:48:26,537 --> 00:48:29,574 [ Laughs ] Lovely, but loud. Oh, too loud? 655 00:48:29,640 --> 00:48:31,076 Yes. You'd like soft music. 656 00:48:31,142 --> 00:48:33,078 Mm-hmm. Gentlemen, just strings this time. 657 00:48:33,144 --> 00:48:38,349 ♪♪ [ Slow, Strings ] 658 00:48:49,027 --> 00:48:51,796 ♪♪ [ Fades ] Mmm, that's pretty. 659 00:48:51,862 --> 00:48:55,967 Or maybe you had in mind something like this-- A little dark place-- 660 00:48:56,034 --> 00:48:59,704 A very mysterious guy playing piano with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. 661 00:48:59,770 --> 00:49:05,076 [ Exhales ] ♪♪ [ Piano ] 662 00:49:11,049 --> 00:49:14,085 Out of tune. What's happened to you? 663 00:49:14,152 --> 00:49:22,193 ♪ I'm mad about the girl next door ♪ 664 00:49:23,561 --> 00:49:28,099 ♪ The girl next door to me ♪ 665 00:49:28,166 --> 00:49:30,168 ♪♪ [ Piano Flourish ] 666 00:49:30,235 --> 00:49:33,971 ♪ Oh, how I wish and I pray ♪ 667 00:49:34,039 --> 00:49:38,076 ♪ That she would be more much more ♪ 668 00:49:38,143 --> 00:49:42,213 ♪ Than just neighborly ♪ ♪♪ [ Flourish ] 669 00:49:44,315 --> 00:49:48,119 ♪ I'm mad, I'm mad I'm crazy for ♪ 670 00:49:48,186 --> 00:49:50,755 ♪ The girl next door to me ♪ 671 00:49:50,821 --> 00:49:54,492 ♪ To borrow a book I may make a call ♪ ♪♪ [ Piano Continues ] 672 00:49:54,559 --> 00:49:58,329 ♪ But I really don't want a book at all ♪ 673 00:49:58,396 --> 00:50:00,531 ♪ Just wanna look at that face ♪ 674 00:50:00,598 --> 00:50:04,069 ♪ Oh, that face Oh, that fabulous face ♪ 675 00:50:04,135 --> 00:50:07,072 ♪ And when I gaze at that grin ♪ 676 00:50:07,138 --> 00:50:09,707 ♪ I go spinning right out of the place ♪ 677 00:50:09,774 --> 00:50:13,511 ♪♪ [ Orchestra, Loud ] ♪ Say, I'd fight any fella for ♪ 678 00:50:13,578 --> 00:50:17,082 ♪ The girl next door to me ♪ 679 00:50:17,148 --> 00:50:20,151 ♪ Someday she may wear a special smile ♪ 680 00:50:20,218 --> 00:50:23,154 ♪ For a special walk down a special aisle ♪ 681 00:50:23,221 --> 00:50:30,061 ♪ And I'll be perplexed if I'm not standing next to the girl next door ♪ 682 00:50:30,128 --> 00:50:33,231 ♪♪ [ Instrumental ] 683 00:51:13,138 --> 00:51:14,239 ♪♪ [ Cymbal Crash ] 684 00:51:22,913 --> 00:51:26,351 ♪♪ [ Continues ] 685 00:51:31,222 --> 00:51:34,292 ♪♪ [ Stops ] [ Laughs ] 686 00:51:49,474 --> 00:51:52,943 Oh, and Bill, what Reed said-- the syndication-- I'm sure he'll take care of it. 687 00:51:53,010 --> 00:51:55,446 I know it. 688 00:51:58,283 --> 00:52:01,452 Well, good night! Oh, good night. 689 00:52:03,354 --> 00:52:05,556 Good night. [ Chuckles ] 690 00:52:05,623 --> 00:52:08,459 [ Engine Starts ] Call you. 691 00:52:33,784 --> 00:52:35,720 Dad! 692 00:52:37,855 --> 00:52:41,726 [ Footsteps Running ] She shampooed my hair and rinsed it four times! 693 00:52:41,792 --> 00:52:44,195 Sorry. And she clipped my toenails like I didn't know how! 694 00:52:44,262 --> 00:52:47,498 And she told me a bedtime story! How did I know she was an imbecile? 695 00:52:47,565 --> 00:52:50,235 Dad, you just gotta promise me that she'll never get me again. 696 00:52:50,301 --> 00:52:52,303 Okay. No matter what she says. 697 00:52:52,370 --> 00:52:54,772 No matter what she says, I promise, okay? Okay. 698 00:52:56,441 --> 00:52:59,677 [ Singsong ] For of life, I've made a study, 699 00:52:59,744 --> 00:53:03,481 and I would rather have... a buddy... 700 00:53:03,548 --> 00:53:07,985 than a female fuddy-duddy... 701 00:53:08,052 --> 00:53:10,855 anytime. Anytime? 702 00:53:11,989 --> 00:53:13,924 Anytime. 703 00:54:23,961 --> 00:54:25,996 [ Engine Humming ] 704 00:54:40,378 --> 00:54:44,181 End of the line. Everybody out! 705 00:54:44,248 --> 00:54:48,386 Yahoo! Joe! Look at that! 706 00:54:48,453 --> 00:54:50,254 [ Joe ] Hey, Benny, Lowlife, look! 707 00:54:50,321 --> 00:54:55,426 Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy. We're gonna catch some fish today. 708 00:54:55,493 --> 00:54:57,928 All right, fellas, catch. 709 00:54:57,995 --> 00:55:00,064 Alley-oop! 710 00:55:00,130 --> 00:55:02,066 Alley-oop! Alley-oop! 711 00:55:02,132 --> 00:55:04,935 Alley-oop! Alley-oop! 712 00:55:10,408 --> 00:55:12,610 Alley-oop. 713 00:55:12,677 --> 00:55:15,480 Benny, front and center! 714 00:55:21,085 --> 00:55:23,053 [ Air Hissing ] 715 00:55:25,590 --> 00:55:28,025 Hey, Joe! Come on, will you? 716 00:55:28,092 --> 00:55:30,060 I'm comin'! 717 00:55:30,127 --> 00:55:32,997 Let's go! Bye. 718 00:55:34,131 --> 00:55:36,834 ♪♪ [ Humming ] 719 00:55:36,901 --> 00:55:39,537 Look at 'em, Dad! Hundreds! Thousands! 720 00:55:41,205 --> 00:55:44,074 Mmm, yeah. This looks like a pretty good spot. 721 00:55:54,652 --> 00:55:57,822 I got one! I'll say you have! I got one too! 722 00:55:57,888 --> 00:56:01,926 Boy, what a beauty! Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy. They're bitin' today! 723 00:56:03,360 --> 00:56:06,163 Benny, y'all show me how to catch a fish? 724 00:56:06,230 --> 00:56:09,934 Well, fishing is an art, Lowlife-- an exact science. 725 00:56:10,000 --> 00:56:12,703 There are three qualities that mark the true fisherman. 726 00:56:12,770 --> 00:56:15,372 Number one. Pole in the proper position. 727 00:56:15,440 --> 00:56:17,575 Number two. Peace of mind. 728 00:56:17,642 --> 00:56:20,210 Number three. And patience! 729 00:56:20,277 --> 00:56:24,348 Number four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14-- 730 00:56:24,415 --> 00:56:27,017 [ Counting Rapidly ] 731 00:56:27,084 --> 00:56:30,955 [ Laughing ] 732 00:56:32,389 --> 00:56:35,726 Twenty-nine. Limit. 733 00:56:35,793 --> 00:56:40,230 This is the life. Smell that air, Joe. 734 00:56:40,297 --> 00:56:43,067 Yeah. Boy, is this ever fun! 735 00:56:47,037 --> 00:56:52,643 [ Incoming Hum ] 736 00:56:55,079 --> 00:56:57,081 [ Splash ] What was that? 737 00:56:57,147 --> 00:57:01,185 Must've been a whopper. Ooh! It is a whopper. And I got it! 738 00:57:10,961 --> 00:57:15,099 Hey, what happened, Joe? She-She-- 739 00:57:15,165 --> 00:57:19,303 Achoo! I-- I got it now. 740 00:57:19,369 --> 00:57:22,907 It must be Old Moose Head. It is Moose Head! Look! Joe! 741 00:57:22,973 --> 00:57:25,610 It's mine! She took it! The witch did it. 742 00:57:25,676 --> 00:57:28,312 - Which witch? - She's down there! 743 00:57:28,378 --> 00:57:31,081 I saw her! Down there! 744 00:57:31,148 --> 00:57:33,017 Ah, you're seein' things. 745 00:57:38,122 --> 00:57:41,859 [ Air Hissing ] 746 00:57:43,360 --> 00:57:47,598 [ Chuckles ] Must've sprung a leak. 747 00:57:47,665 --> 00:57:51,301 She did it! Spoiled our fun. She did it! 748 00:57:51,368 --> 00:57:53,370 Huh? Who? Huh? 749 00:57:53,437 --> 00:57:56,040 Hey, it's Jeannie. 750 00:57:56,106 --> 00:57:58,008 Why, Bill Carter, 751 00:57:58,075 --> 00:58:00,077 you've caught the biggest fish in the lake. 752 00:58:00,144 --> 00:58:04,348 Just for that, you get a great big kiss. 753 00:58:04,414 --> 00:58:07,417 Hmph. Always kissin'. 754 00:58:07,484 --> 00:58:10,688 [ Clears Throat ] We caught a fish too. 755 00:58:10,755 --> 00:58:13,357 Do we get a reward? 756 00:58:13,423 --> 00:58:15,760 Why, of course. 757 00:58:15,826 --> 00:58:19,029 I'm giving a party at my house, and you're invited. 758 00:58:19,096 --> 00:58:23,267 [ Singsong ] A party, a party. We're going to a party. 759 00:58:23,333 --> 00:58:26,671 But, Dad! We came up here to get away from dames! 760 00:58:27,572 --> 00:58:30,240 All aboard! 761 00:58:35,780 --> 00:58:41,251 Dad, Benny, Lowlife! Dad! Dad! Dad! 762 00:58:43,688 --> 00:58:47,625 [ Sobbing ] 763 00:58:47,692 --> 00:58:50,961 Joe? Aw, go away. 764 00:58:51,028 --> 00:58:53,130 No. 765 00:58:53,197 --> 00:58:57,001 What's the matter, Joe? It's my father. 766 00:58:57,067 --> 00:59:00,605 Oh, is he dead? No. He's done something. 767 00:59:00,671 --> 00:59:06,543 Something bad? You don't have to tell me, but if you do, I won't tell anyone. 768 00:59:06,611 --> 00:59:09,213 Look at this. 769 00:59:11,548 --> 00:59:15,052 But you're not in Canada. And our strip's supposed to be true. 770 00:59:15,119 --> 00:59:17,254 People will see this, and they'll believe it. 771 00:59:17,321 --> 00:59:19,590 I don't know what's the matter with him lately. 772 00:59:19,657 --> 00:59:22,693 Yes, I do. It's her. He kissed her. 773 00:59:22,760 --> 00:59:25,896 Not like on your birthday. He kissed her funny-like. 774 00:59:25,963 --> 00:59:29,499 She'll hook 'im. Then they'll send you away to camp. You'll see. 775 00:59:29,566 --> 00:59:34,004 I don't care. But why does he have to do it like this? 776 00:59:34,071 --> 00:59:38,108 It's just a big lie! That's terrible to have your father be a liar. 777 00:59:40,978 --> 00:59:45,582 Mine lies to me sometimes. Well, mine's lyin' to thousands and thousands of people. 778 00:59:45,650 --> 00:59:48,185 They oughta know about it. You oughta tell 'em. 779 00:59:48,252 --> 00:59:50,387 I couldn't squeal on him. 780 00:59:50,454 --> 00:59:54,424 Otherwise it'll just go on and on. You know how it is when you don't get caught. 781 00:59:54,491 --> 00:59:56,293 Kinda like cheatin' in school, huh? 782 00:59:56,360 --> 00:59:58,729 After a while, he'll get to be no good at all. 783 00:59:58,796 --> 01:00:02,700 Boy, I'll bet if his boss knew about that on the paper, he'd be plenty sore. 784 01:00:02,767 --> 01:00:06,370 That'd be good. He'd say, "You stop lyin' or I'll tell the people." 785 01:00:06,436 --> 01:00:09,539 That way I wouldn't be squealin' so much, would I? No, not much at all. 786 01:00:09,606 --> 01:00:13,377 Besides, if you put it in a letter, you wouldn't even have to sign your name. 787 01:00:13,443 --> 01:00:16,113 Hmm. I'll do it. Good. 788 01:00:16,180 --> 01:00:19,216 I have to go now. 789 01:00:19,283 --> 01:00:21,686 Thanks a lot, Kitty. 790 01:00:21,752 --> 01:00:24,221 You been real nice for a girl. Bye. 791 01:00:44,842 --> 01:00:47,712 [ Door Clatters ] 792 01:00:51,648 --> 01:00:53,718 [ Door Clatters ] 793 01:00:56,220 --> 01:00:58,522 ♪♪ [ Light ] I'll be right back. 794 01:00:58,588 --> 01:01:01,859 Bill! Boy, am I glad to see you. I didn't even know you cared. 795 01:01:01,926 --> 01:01:04,006 I've gotta talk to you about something very important. 796 01:01:04,061 --> 01:01:07,464 Look. One night let's not talk about syndication, the Yankee dollar or my strip. 797 01:01:07,531 --> 01:01:10,510 Oh, that. That's all settled. King Features-- They're drawing up the contracts. 798 01:01:10,534 --> 01:01:13,437 Scotch and water. But this is very vital. It's about community property. 799 01:01:13,503 --> 01:01:16,006 Community property? Yeah. Rosie and me. I asked her to marry me. 800 01:01:16,073 --> 01:01:18,142 And, well, she didn't exactly say no. 801 01:01:18,208 --> 01:01:20,644 That's a step in the right direction. What do I do now? 802 01:01:20,711 --> 01:01:23,080 What do you do now? Romance her. Soft lights, sweet music. 803 01:01:23,147 --> 01:01:25,215 Where is she? She's out on the terrace. 804 01:01:25,282 --> 01:01:27,684 That's a natural. Go dance with her. Sing in her ear. 805 01:01:27,752 --> 01:01:30,988 But what should I sing? Sing anything you know. One of those songs Jeannie sings. 806 01:01:31,055 --> 01:01:33,323 Which one? Well, like "You." That's a pretty song. 807 01:01:33,390 --> 01:01:36,961 I don't remember the words. Well, I do. I've been listenin' to them for days. 808 01:01:37,027 --> 01:01:39,897 Go ahead. I'll be right behind you. Well, okay. 809 01:01:40,898 --> 01:01:43,200 ♪♪ [ Soft Jazz ] 810 01:01:44,368 --> 01:01:46,303 Hi. Hi. 811 01:01:46,370 --> 01:01:48,739 Remember what you said about my glasses? 812 01:01:48,806 --> 01:01:50,941 Oh, stop it. Huh? 813 01:01:51,008 --> 01:01:53,243 Don't just stand there. Say something. 814 01:01:53,310 --> 01:01:57,081 Well, I-- You walk by and I behold a lovely day. 815 01:01:57,147 --> 01:02:05,355 ♪ You walk by and I behold a lovely day ♪ 816 01:02:05,422 --> 01:02:13,130 A lovely day begins-- ♪ A lovely day begins and ends with you ♪ 817 01:02:13,197 --> 01:02:15,599 You appear, and I'm so near to early spring. 818 01:02:15,665 --> 01:02:24,508 ♪ You appear and I'm so near to early spring ♪ 819 01:02:24,574 --> 01:02:32,249 And you're the "you"-- ♪ And you're the "you" in every song I sing ♪ 820 01:02:32,316 --> 01:02:33,784 What's a smile? 821 01:02:33,851 --> 01:02:37,855 ♪ What's a smile Your hello ♪ 822 01:02:37,922 --> 01:02:39,289 What's a tear? 823 01:02:39,356 --> 01:02:43,193 ♪ What's a tear Your good-bye ♪ 824 01:02:43,260 --> 01:02:48,498 Yes, and without you-- ♪ Yes, and without you ♪ 825 01:02:48,565 --> 01:02:52,236 ♪ What am I ♪ 826 01:02:52,302 --> 01:02:55,272 ♪ My darling ♪ You're on your own. 827 01:02:55,339 --> 01:03:02,712 ♪ You are every hope and dream worth clinging to ♪ 828 01:03:02,779 --> 01:03:10,387 ♪ And might I add this phrase before I'm through ♪ 829 01:03:11,922 --> 01:03:20,530 ♪ That love by any other name is you ♪ 830 01:03:20,597 --> 01:03:22,799 Pop. Yeah? 831 01:03:22,867 --> 01:03:25,002 Hold on. 832 01:03:27,704 --> 01:03:31,675 [ Chattering ] 833 01:03:31,741 --> 01:03:35,279 Bill? Did Reed tell you about setting the syndication of your strip? 834 01:03:35,345 --> 01:03:37,481 Yes, he did. Oh, good. I'm glad. 835 01:03:37,547 --> 01:03:39,783 Yeah, so am I. 'Cause I'm gonna need the money. 836 01:03:39,850 --> 01:03:42,519 Why? You and Joe have everything you need. 837 01:03:43,988 --> 01:03:46,090 Well, I was thinking about getting married. 838 01:03:46,156 --> 01:03:49,293 Have you ever thought about getting married? Yes, I have. 839 01:03:49,359 --> 01:03:52,662 Oh. Well, I was thinking about getting married to you. 840 01:03:52,729 --> 01:03:56,700 Have you ever thought about getting married to me? Yes, I have. 841 01:03:56,766 --> 01:03:58,835 Well, then, why don't you? 842 01:03:58,903 --> 01:04:02,072 Oh! What was that for? Oh, fine. 843 01:04:02,139 --> 01:04:04,174 You can play Cyrano with Reed, 844 01:04:04,241 --> 01:04:08,145 but when it comes to my very own proposal, you throw it away in front of a mob. 845 01:04:08,212 --> 01:04:12,116 Mob? That's funny. I don't see anyone around but you. 846 01:04:12,182 --> 01:04:18,122 ♪ And I behold a lovely day ♪ 847 01:04:18,188 --> 01:04:24,628 ♪ A lovely day begins and ends with you ♪ 848 01:04:24,694 --> 01:04:27,564 You appear, and I'm so near to early spring. 849 01:04:27,631 --> 01:04:36,974 ♪ You appear and I'm so near to early spring ♪ 850 01:04:37,041 --> 01:04:43,613 [ Together ] ♪ And you're the "you" in every song I sing ♪ 851 01:04:46,050 --> 01:04:50,487 ♪ What's a smile ♪ ♪ Your hello ♪ 852 01:04:50,554 --> 01:04:55,993 ♪ What's a tear ♪ ♪ Your good-bye ♪ 853 01:04:56,060 --> 01:05:03,600 Yes? ♪ And without you what am I ♪ 854 01:05:03,667 --> 01:05:11,575 [ Together ] ♪ My darling, you are every hope and dream ♪ 855 01:05:13,377 --> 01:05:23,353 ♪ And might I add this phrase before we're through ♪ 856 01:05:23,420 --> 01:05:36,100 [ All ] ♪ That love by any other name is you ♪♪ 857 01:05:36,166 --> 01:05:42,006 ♪♪ [ Holds Note ] 858 01:05:49,313 --> 01:05:51,348 Don't get out. What's the trouble, O'Toole? 859 01:05:51,415 --> 01:05:54,318 Now, take it easy, Mr. Carter. It's Joe. Joe? Is he hurt? 860 01:05:54,384 --> 01:05:57,121 No, no. Just a little scared. 861 01:05:57,187 --> 01:06:00,190 He's down at the station. Got himself in a little jam. 862 01:06:00,257 --> 01:06:04,294 What kind of a jam? Robbing the United States mail. 863 01:06:09,099 --> 01:06:12,436 When you put a stamp on a letter and mail it, it belongs to Uncle Sam. 864 01:06:12,502 --> 01:06:15,172 It wasn't addressed to him. Who was it addressed to? 865 01:06:15,239 --> 01:06:17,707 Never mind. I just changed my mind after I mailed it. 866 01:06:17,774 --> 01:06:19,709 Why? I won't tell you, 867 01:06:19,776 --> 01:06:22,679 not even if you put me in jail for the rest of my life. 868 01:06:24,348 --> 01:06:26,283 Hi, Joe. 869 01:06:27,584 --> 01:06:31,188 Hi. What is it, Joe? 870 01:06:32,356 --> 01:06:34,858 I-- I-I mailed a letter to your boss. 871 01:06:34,924 --> 01:06:38,295 I told 'im you-- that you lied. 872 01:06:40,064 --> 01:06:45,402 Why? You said we were in Canada, and we aren't. That's a lie. 873 01:06:47,037 --> 01:06:49,306 I just didn't want everybody to know about it, 874 01:06:49,373 --> 01:06:52,376 so I tried to get it back. 875 01:06:57,381 --> 01:07:01,385 Why didn't you come to me? Talk this over? Isn't that the way we handle things? 876 01:07:01,451 --> 01:07:04,421 Well, it's different now. You're always with her. 877 01:07:04,488 --> 01:07:07,557 And even when you are with me, you never listen. 878 01:07:07,624 --> 01:07:10,994 And, well, I'm all mixed-up. Nothing's the same anymore. 879 01:07:11,061 --> 01:07:13,963 Kitty said you were stuck on her. 880 01:07:14,030 --> 01:07:19,969 That my name'd be mud and you'd be sending me off to camps and everything. 881 01:07:20,036 --> 01:07:23,507 Well, I feel funny all over. 882 01:07:23,573 --> 01:07:25,642 And nothing's the same anymore. 883 01:07:25,709 --> 01:07:28,078 It's all her fault, 'cause I hate her-- Joe! 884 01:07:34,751 --> 01:07:37,754 Joe, I want you to apologize to Jeannie. 885 01:07:37,821 --> 01:07:40,524 Tell her you're sorry and that you didn't mean it. 886 01:07:42,892 --> 01:07:47,063 I'm waiting. I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. 887 01:07:47,131 --> 01:07:50,834 But I'm not sorry I said it. And I won't say I didn't mean it, 'cause I did. 888 01:07:50,900 --> 01:07:53,670 What'd you have to spoil everything for? Why don't you leave us alone? 889 01:07:53,737 --> 01:07:55,939 We were doin' okay, just the two of us! 890 01:07:56,005 --> 01:07:58,408 Oh, Joe. No, Jeannie, don't. 891 01:07:58,475 --> 01:08:01,578 We'll talk about this later. Thanks, Simon. That's okay. 892 01:08:01,645 --> 01:08:03,680 Thanks, Frank. Sure, Mr. Carter. 893 01:08:05,749 --> 01:08:07,684 [ Whistles ] 894 01:08:18,828 --> 01:08:21,865 Go in the kitchen, Son, and wait for me. I'll be in in a minute. 895 01:08:21,931 --> 01:08:24,234 Get yourself a glass of milk. 896 01:08:25,835 --> 01:08:28,905 I'm sorry, Jeannie. Oh, Bill, he's just a baby. 897 01:08:28,972 --> 01:08:34,544 He was so upset. We certainly can't get married with him feeling like this. 898 01:08:34,611 --> 01:08:36,980 We're certainly not gonna not get married just because of it. 899 01:08:37,046 --> 01:08:41,585 That would be pretty ridiculous, wouldn't it? Yes. Yes, it would. 900 01:08:41,651 --> 01:08:45,489 Our little friend in there's just gotta be told. Nobody owns anybody. 901 01:08:45,555 --> 01:08:48,091 Everybody's gotta live their own life. 902 01:08:48,158 --> 01:08:50,059 It's gonna be rough on him, and I'm sorry, 903 01:08:50,126 --> 01:08:53,363 but I just can't sit back and let him live in a stall shower. 904 01:08:53,430 --> 01:08:55,999 Oh, no. No, he's got to learn, for his own sake. 905 01:08:56,065 --> 01:08:59,503 Oh, for our sake too. Look, he's my kid, and I love him, 906 01:08:59,569 --> 01:09:02,639 but we're important-- the rest of our lives, that's important too. 907 01:09:02,706 --> 01:09:05,309 It isn't as if he really hated me. 908 01:09:05,375 --> 01:09:07,277 Me personally, I mean. Of course not. 909 01:09:07,344 --> 01:09:11,215 No, he'd feel the same way about anybody in my place. Well, of course. 910 01:09:15,619 --> 01:09:18,588 There's no point in stalling. I'm just gonna go tell him. 911 01:09:18,655 --> 01:09:23,227 You and I are gonna get married, and the three of us are gonna live happily ever after. 912 01:09:26,363 --> 01:09:28,565 Only, uh, Jeannie? 913 01:09:28,632 --> 01:09:31,167 You think I might better wait until the morning? 914 01:09:31,235 --> 01:09:35,071 Maybe after he's had a... good night's rest? 915 01:09:35,138 --> 01:09:37,874 No? No. Get it over now, Bill. 916 01:09:43,280 --> 01:09:45,782 Bill? Hmm? 917 01:09:45,849 --> 01:09:50,053 Now, uh, what if he should, uh, get upset? You know, I mean-- 918 01:09:50,119 --> 01:09:52,656 Well, what if he cries? 919 01:09:53,890 --> 01:09:56,393 What if he cries? 920 01:09:57,627 --> 01:10:02,699 Well, I'll tell you. Then he cries. 921 01:10:12,576 --> 01:10:15,412 Joe. 922 01:10:15,479 --> 01:10:18,715 There are a few things I wanna say to you. 923 01:10:18,782 --> 01:10:24,621 Now, I know we have a lot of fun. We kid around a lot. 924 01:10:24,688 --> 01:10:27,557 But I'm still your father. 925 01:10:29,526 --> 01:10:33,430 Now in the first place, when I'm talking to you, I want you to look at me. 926 01:10:35,164 --> 01:10:37,867 Now, in the first-- In the second place. 927 01:10:37,934 --> 01:10:40,069 I think that you've behaved very, very badly. 928 01:10:40,136 --> 01:10:42,539 I shouldn't have written that letter. I don't mean the letter. 929 01:10:42,606 --> 01:10:46,242 I wouldn't have if it hadn't been for Kitty. You listen to a girl, you get into trouble. 930 01:10:46,310 --> 01:10:49,045 You've gotten into trouble because I said a lot of silly things. 931 01:10:49,112 --> 01:10:51,981 But you're the smartest guy I know. Joe, stop that! It won't work. 932 01:10:52,048 --> 01:10:55,027 I'm talking about Jeannie. You're talkin' about Jeannie, and we both know it. 933 01:10:55,051 --> 01:10:57,563 Quit horsin' around, or I'm gonna whale the livin' tar outta you! 934 01:10:57,587 --> 01:10:59,689 Bill, don't you dare say another word to that boy, 935 01:10:59,756 --> 01:11:02,626 not another word, or I'll never speak to you again. 936 01:11:02,692 --> 01:11:05,695 Why-- You can't just force me on him like you would castor oil. 937 01:11:05,762 --> 01:11:08,598 He can't help it if he doesn't like me. He'll get to like you-- 938 01:11:08,665 --> 01:11:10,843 Did you ever hear of anyone getting to like castor oil... 939 01:11:10,867 --> 01:11:12,969 just because somebody made a speech at him? 940 01:11:13,036 --> 01:11:15,317 You're the one who keeps saying-- I don't care what I said! 941 01:11:15,372 --> 01:11:17,750 You're not going to break his heart. I'm not breaking his heart! 942 01:11:17,774 --> 01:11:20,877 Poor little thing, sitting here crying. He is not crying! 943 01:11:20,944 --> 01:11:23,613 He would have been if I hadn't stopped you bullying him. 944 01:11:23,680 --> 01:11:26,916 I'm the one who's too soft? Fine tough-hearted character you turned out to be. 945 01:11:26,983 --> 01:11:29,829 Wanna make something out of it? No, you're making enough mess for both of us. 946 01:11:29,853 --> 01:11:32,365 Who's making the mess? Whose fault has it been right from the beginning? 947 01:11:32,389 --> 01:11:35,392 Mine! I admit it. Now I wanna do something about it, you won't let me. 948 01:11:35,459 --> 01:11:37,260 So who's wrong now? I am! Feel better? 949 01:11:37,327 --> 01:11:39,128 No. Good. 950 01:11:39,195 --> 01:11:41,173 I'm not gonna marry you unless Joe wants me to. That's insane. 951 01:11:41,197 --> 01:11:44,634 There's no way that won't take years. Stop yelling! 952 01:11:44,701 --> 01:11:47,504 I am not yelling at you. You're just acting like a darn fool. 953 01:11:47,571 --> 01:11:51,708 [ Sighs ] Go draw yourself a picture. 954 01:12:05,489 --> 01:12:08,792 Night, Dad. Good night, Son. 955 01:12:19,403 --> 01:12:21,905 What's the matter? Hmm? Oh, nothin'. 956 01:12:23,640 --> 01:12:26,643 I'm sorry I was so rough on you. Oh, that's okay. 957 01:12:28,011 --> 01:12:31,047 You know, you can't teach an old dog new tricks. 958 01:12:31,114 --> 01:12:34,518 A fella gets an idea he can change, but it isn't smart. 959 01:12:34,584 --> 01:12:38,788 Better stick with what you know. Yeah, sure. 960 01:12:38,855 --> 01:12:41,725 What are you fidgeting about? Huh? Nothing. 961 01:12:41,791 --> 01:12:44,694 You outgrowing your shorts again? No. 962 01:12:47,764 --> 01:12:52,035 We were getting along fine. We never needed anybody else. 963 01:12:52,101 --> 01:12:56,339 Dad, you don't mind, do you? I got a date to go see a show. 964 01:12:56,406 --> 01:12:59,375 You got a date? Who? A pal. 965 01:12:59,443 --> 01:13:04,113 Who? Kitty. You don't mind, do you, Dad? 966 01:13:04,180 --> 01:13:07,517 No. Better step on it. 967 01:13:07,584 --> 01:13:10,587 Come home right after the show. Sure, okay. 968 01:13:10,654 --> 01:13:13,122 No, Benny. You stay here. Keep Dad company. 969 01:14:09,312 --> 01:14:13,717 [ Chorus ] ♪ I'm mad about the girl next door ♪ 970 01:14:13,783 --> 01:14:18,522 ♪ I'm mad about the girl next door ♪ 971 01:14:18,588 --> 01:14:24,628 ♪ I'm mad about the girl next door ♪ 972 01:14:24,694 --> 01:14:27,831 ♪♪ [ Fades ] 973 01:14:27,897 --> 01:14:31,568 ♪♪ [ "I'd Rather Have A Pal" ] 974 01:14:40,043 --> 01:14:42,712 ♪♪ [ Builds ] 975 01:14:42,779 --> 01:14:50,787 ♪ You walk by and I behold a lovely day ♪ 976 01:14:50,854 --> 01:14:56,225 ♪ A lovely day begins and ends with you ♪ 977 01:14:59,395 --> 01:15:07,604 ♪ You appear, and I'm so near to early spring ♪ 978 01:15:07,671 --> 01:15:13,777 ♪ And you're the "you" in every song I sing ♪ 979 01:15:13,843 --> 01:15:17,714 ♪♪ [ Chorus Vocalizing ] 980 01:15:27,356 --> 01:15:33,597 ♪♪ [ Vocalizing Continues ] 981 01:15:39,636 --> 01:15:44,841 ♪ My darling, you ♪ 982 01:15:44,908 --> 01:15:51,881 ♪ Are every hope and dream worth clinging to ♪ 983 01:15:58,722 --> 01:16:01,725 ♪♪ [ Fades ] 984 01:16:05,929 --> 01:16:09,699 ♪♪ [ "I'd Rather Have A Pal" ] 985 01:16:14,437 --> 01:16:18,207 ♪♪ [ Upbeat ] 986 01:16:18,274 --> 01:16:22,178 [ Male Chorus ] ♪ I'd rather have a pal than a gal anytime ♪ 987 01:16:24,781 --> 01:16:29,185 ♪ I'd rather have a chum than a pretty yummy-yum anytime ♪ 988 01:16:31,054 --> 01:16:34,223 ♪ When a frail starts coyly grinnin' ♪ 989 01:16:34,290 --> 01:16:37,927 ♪ Then she's out to do some winnin' ♪ 990 01:16:37,994 --> 01:16:43,132 ♪ And you know that a frail is a synonym for trouble ♪ 991 01:16:43,199 --> 01:16:45,134 ♪ Double trouble ♪ 992 01:16:45,201 --> 01:16:49,005 ♪ I'd rather have a pal than a gal anytime ♪ 993 01:16:51,474 --> 01:16:55,211 ♪ So if you're thinkin' damewise play your game wise ♪ 994 01:17:01,317 --> 01:17:05,822 ♪♪ [ Fades ] 995 01:17:05,889 --> 01:17:08,224 ♪♪ [ Builds ] 996 01:17:10,326 --> 01:17:14,597 [ Female Chorus ] ♪ I'm mad about the girl next door ♪ 997 01:17:14,664 --> 01:17:18,234 ♪ The girl next door to me ♪ 998 01:17:19,635 --> 01:17:23,239 ♪♪ [ Vocalizing ] 999 01:17:35,752 --> 01:17:39,388 ♪♪ [ Instrumental ] 1000 01:17:44,694 --> 01:17:48,965 [ Chorus ] ♪ Oh, let me see that face ♪ 1001 01:17:49,032 --> 01:17:52,702 ♪ That fabulous face ♪ 1002 01:17:52,769 --> 01:17:56,072 ♪ Oh, when I see that grin ♪ 1003 01:17:56,139 --> 01:17:59,208 ♪ I go spinning right out of the-- ♪ 1004 01:17:59,275 --> 01:18:02,712 ♪♪ [ Vocalizing ] 1005 01:18:02,779 --> 01:18:07,016 ♪♪ [ Fades ] 1006 01:18:09,218 --> 01:18:12,288 ♪♪ [ "I'd Rather Have A Pal" ] 1007 01:18:14,690 --> 01:18:17,060 ♪♪ [ Builds ] 1008 01:18:17,126 --> 01:18:20,764 ♪♪ [ "I'd Rather Have A Pal", Upbeat ] 1009 01:18:44,587 --> 01:18:52,428 ♪ You are every hope and dream worth living for ♪ 1010 01:19:01,704 --> 01:19:03,907 ♪♪ [ Fades ] 1011 01:19:03,973 --> 01:19:10,513 ♪ For love by any other name ♪ 1012 01:19:10,579 --> 01:19:14,317 ♪ Is ♪ 1013 01:19:14,383 --> 01:19:17,887 ♪ You ♪ 1014 01:19:17,954 --> 01:19:21,490 ♪♪ [ Vocalizing ] 1015 01:19:21,557 --> 01:19:27,931 ♪ You, You, You, You ♪ 1016 01:19:27,997 --> 01:19:31,935 ♪ You, You ♪ 1017 01:19:32,001 --> 01:19:37,306 ♪ You ♪♪ 1018 01:19:57,760 --> 01:19:59,996 [ Joe ] I got one. 1019 01:20:02,498 --> 01:20:06,802 Get in there. Pop's running another movie tonight. A western! 1020 01:20:06,870 --> 01:20:09,105 Aw, I can't, Kitty. "Aw, I can't, Kitty." 1021 01:20:09,172 --> 01:20:11,374 Hey-- Some best friend you turned out to be. 1022 01:20:11,440 --> 01:20:14,410 It's not my fault. It's my father's. Well, just tell him. 1023 01:20:14,477 --> 01:20:18,982 Aw, it'd hurt his feelings. Can't you get him busy with her again? 1024 01:20:19,048 --> 01:20:23,252 Nah. He just looks over at her yard and gets sad. 1025 01:20:23,319 --> 01:20:26,355 He oughta get married. I think he's all through with women. 1026 01:20:26,422 --> 01:20:30,259 How come? He's got a nerve! A man's supposed to be with a lady. 1027 01:20:30,326 --> 01:20:34,230 Children are extra. Says who? 1028 01:20:34,297 --> 01:20:37,800 Says everybody. If your father hadn't married your mother, 1029 01:20:37,867 --> 01:20:39,768 you wouldn't be catching frogs today. 1030 01:20:39,835 --> 01:20:42,805 Look at all the married people. Do you think they're dopey? 1031 01:20:42,872 --> 01:20:45,308 Look at Noah. Who did he put on the ark? 1032 01:20:45,374 --> 01:20:47,911 A lady lion and a man lion, that's what. 1033 01:20:47,977 --> 01:20:50,213 And a lady rabbit and a man rabbit. 1034 01:20:50,279 --> 01:20:53,316 And the same with everybody else, except your father. 1035 01:20:53,382 --> 01:20:55,384 Well, what am I supposed to do about it? 1036 01:20:55,451 --> 01:20:57,786 Go find yourself a new best friend, that's what. 1037 01:20:57,853 --> 01:21:00,056 Kitty! 1038 01:21:03,492 --> 01:21:05,561 I finished packing your wardrobe trunk, madam. 1039 01:21:05,628 --> 01:21:07,839 Shall I prepare an overnight case for your immediate needs? 1040 01:21:07,863 --> 01:21:12,401 Yes, please, Evelyn. Oh, uh, tell Samuels to call the expressman too, will you? 1041 01:21:12,468 --> 01:21:14,337 Very good, madam. 1042 01:21:17,473 --> 01:21:22,545 [ Barking ] Oh, Benny! Benny. [ Laughs ] 1043 01:21:22,611 --> 01:21:26,382 What'd you do? Come over to say good-bye, huh? [ Joe ] Good-bye? 1044 01:21:26,449 --> 01:21:29,085 Are you leaving? 1045 01:21:30,253 --> 01:21:33,222 Yes, I'm leaving for good. Movin'? 1046 01:21:33,289 --> 01:21:35,925 That's right. What for? 1047 01:21:35,992 --> 01:21:38,361 [ Barking ] I should think you'd be glad. 1048 01:21:40,763 --> 01:21:45,868 Joe, no hard feelings. Everybody can't like everybody. 1049 01:21:45,935 --> 01:21:50,639 I don't exactly not like you. Thanks. 1050 01:21:50,706 --> 01:21:55,544 You mad at Dad? Yes. No, I-- 1051 01:21:55,611 --> 01:21:59,282 Well, Joe, sometimes people get upset and... 1052 01:21:59,348 --> 01:22:01,384 they say things they don't mean. 1053 01:22:02,751 --> 01:22:05,354 Does he know you're goin' away? I don't know. 1054 01:22:05,421 --> 01:22:09,225 What difference would it make? Yeah. 1055 01:22:09,292 --> 01:22:12,161 Say-- Come on, Benny. 1056 01:22:16,432 --> 01:22:21,170 That's an awful pretty dress. [ Sobs ] 1057 01:22:24,573 --> 01:22:27,176 [ Sobbing Continues ] 1058 01:22:30,679 --> 01:22:32,982 Well, howdy, Sam. How you all? Is Miss Laird in? 1059 01:22:33,049 --> 01:22:35,118 I'm afraid she's-- Jeannie! 1060 01:22:35,184 --> 01:22:37,386 Honey, what's the matter? 1061 01:22:37,453 --> 01:22:42,658 Oh, Rosie, I-- Reed, I'm moving into town, a hotel. What? 1062 01:22:42,725 --> 01:22:46,195 No. Now, I want you to sell the house and everything just as soon as possible. 1063 01:22:46,262 --> 01:22:48,364 Oh, honey. Come on. Take it easy. 1064 01:22:48,431 --> 01:22:50,433 You're playing the second act of Way Down East. 1065 01:22:50,499 --> 01:22:52,668 What's the matter? You have a fight with Bill? No. 1066 01:22:52,735 --> 01:22:56,372 Why is he such a jerk? Sure, he's a jerk. They're all jerks. 1067 01:22:56,439 --> 01:22:58,674 But he's the nicest jerk you've ever known. 1068 01:22:58,741 --> 01:23:01,720 Because he's a jerk doesn't mean you're gonna be a jerk and give away your house. 1069 01:23:01,744 --> 01:23:06,615 But I'm not going to marry anybody who thinks I'm... a mixmaster. 1070 01:23:06,682 --> 01:23:08,817 Oh, we just don't belong together. We're too different. 1071 01:23:08,884 --> 01:23:11,220 You don't have to be a Siamese twin to get married. 1072 01:23:11,287 --> 01:23:13,422 You can say that again. Take a gander at us. 1073 01:23:13,489 --> 01:23:17,560 You ever figure that this type would gas me? You mean you and Reed? 1074 01:23:17,626 --> 01:23:20,363 Yes, the deed is done. Last night at Greenwich, Connecticut. 1075 01:23:20,429 --> 01:23:23,199 You were married? Sure! Look at the circles under my eyes. 1076 01:23:23,266 --> 01:23:26,269 Oh, Rosie, that's wonderful! Congratulations, Reed. 1077 01:23:26,335 --> 01:23:28,880 It's the best thing that's happened to me since I graduated from C.C.N.Y. 1078 01:23:28,904 --> 01:23:31,740 Well, I figured somebody'd marry him for his money, so I did. 1079 01:23:31,807 --> 01:23:34,277 Now, Rosie, you know I'm not rich. You will be someday, Pops. 1080 01:23:34,343 --> 01:23:38,314 You got that pinched look around your nose. I'm very happy for both of you. 1081 01:23:38,381 --> 01:23:40,749 If you're so happy, what are you running away for? 1082 01:23:40,816 --> 01:23:43,719 We figured you'd give us the biggest party a bride and groom could have. 1083 01:23:43,786 --> 01:23:47,456 Hey, after all, you're gonna be the godmother. When, as, and if! 1084 01:23:47,523 --> 01:23:51,994 Right. Of course. Why should I be chased out of my own home? 1085 01:23:52,061 --> 01:23:54,430 Samuels! We will have a party, a big party! 1086 01:23:54,497 --> 01:23:56,732 Sure, let him move. Yeah, let him sell his house. 1087 01:23:56,799 --> 01:23:59,868 Samuels, call the expressman. Tell him to skip it and-and cancel the cab. 1088 01:23:59,935 --> 01:24:02,605 We're having a party. Get the caterers and the band. 1089 01:24:02,671 --> 01:24:04,907 I've changed my mind. Start unpacking! 1090 01:24:04,973 --> 01:24:08,711 Unpacking? Very good, madam. 1091 01:24:08,777 --> 01:24:12,448 ♪♪ [ Big Band ] [ Man ] I wanna know who's paying for this. 1092 01:24:12,515 --> 01:24:14,483 If you do the show in London-- [ Jeannie ] Yes? 1093 01:24:14,550 --> 01:24:16,652 Do it in London, you promise? I promise. 1094 01:24:16,719 --> 01:24:18,663 I'll pay for the party. Mr. and Mrs. Appleton have arrived. 1095 01:24:18,687 --> 01:24:20,723 Oh, wonderful! Hold this, will you please? 1096 01:24:20,789 --> 01:24:22,958 Samuels, keep them filled. Very good, miss. 1097 01:24:23,025 --> 01:24:25,794 Stop the music, boys. Alfred, now. Now. 1098 01:24:25,861 --> 01:24:29,765 [ Excited Chattering ] 1099 01:24:33,469 --> 01:24:37,940 [ Drumroll ] Ladies and gentlemen, the bride and groom! 1100 01:24:38,006 --> 01:24:40,776 [ All Cheering ] 1101 01:24:40,843 --> 01:24:45,614 ♪ This is all so new to me ♪ But you like it. 1102 01:24:45,681 --> 01:24:50,286 ♪ Oh, but what you do to me ♪ 1103 01:24:50,353 --> 01:24:55,358 ♪ If I love you a mountain ♪ 1104 01:24:55,424 --> 01:25:01,063 ♪ And you love me just a tiny hill ♪ 1105 01:25:01,130 --> 01:25:05,768 ♪ If I love you a meadow ♪ 1106 01:25:05,834 --> 01:25:10,806 ♪ Can't you love me just a daffodil ♪ 1107 01:25:12,175 --> 01:25:17,580 ♪ If I need you a symphony ♪ 1108 01:25:17,646 --> 01:25:22,285 ♪ To underscore the mood I'm in ♪ 1109 01:25:22,351 --> 01:25:28,457 ♪ Can't you need me a serenade ♪ 1110 01:25:28,524 --> 01:25:32,661 ♪ Played on a lonely violin ♪ 1111 01:25:32,728 --> 01:25:34,797 ♪♪ [ Muffled ] 1112 01:25:34,863 --> 01:25:37,200 Some party, huh? Mm-hmm. 1113 01:25:37,266 --> 01:25:40,236 You know she's movin'? 1114 01:25:40,303 --> 01:25:43,172 She is? What about it? Just wonderin'. 1115 01:25:44,807 --> 01:25:48,944 [ Reed, Muffled ] ♪ If I miss you an ocean ♪ 1116 01:25:49,011 --> 01:25:56,018 ♪ Can't you miss me just a drop of April rain ♪ 1117 01:25:56,084 --> 01:26:00,523 ♪ Are you my forevermore ♪ 1118 01:26:00,589 --> 01:26:05,561 ♪ Forevermore you are ♪ 1119 01:26:05,628 --> 01:26:13,469 ♪ So if I love you all heaven ♪ 1120 01:26:13,536 --> 01:26:24,447 ♪ Can't you love me just an evening star ♪♪ 1121 01:26:24,513 --> 01:26:28,451 [ Applause, Cheering ] 1122 01:26:28,517 --> 01:26:30,886 Harold, please forgive me. I have an awful headache. 1123 01:26:30,953 --> 01:26:34,490 Jeannie! You see? Today it's a headache. Tomorrow it's a migraine. 1124 01:26:34,557 --> 01:26:36,659 Face it. You're in love with the guy. 1125 01:26:36,725 --> 01:26:38,637 Jeannie, it doesn't matter whether he's right and you're wrong. 1126 01:26:38,661 --> 01:26:40,729 When you're in love, it's 100%. 1127 01:26:40,796 --> 01:26:42,831 When you meet in the middle, it's 50-50. 1128 01:26:42,898 --> 01:26:45,401 Grab it, girl. There's only one gold ring on the merry-go-round. 1129 01:26:45,468 --> 01:26:48,404 And something's got to give. 1130 01:26:51,039 --> 01:26:53,709 ♪♪ [ Continues, Muffled ] 1131 01:26:58,046 --> 01:27:00,316 [ Snaps ] [ Clatters ] 1132 01:27:03,652 --> 01:27:05,754 Joe, come here. I want to talk to you. 1133 01:27:05,821 --> 01:27:08,557 I've made up my mind. Like it or not, this is the way it's gonna be. 1134 01:27:08,624 --> 01:27:11,093 - Let's play drawades. - Joe, I said I wanted to talk to you. 1135 01:27:11,159 --> 01:27:13,396 Please, Dad, let's play drawades, huh? Please, Dad? 1136 01:27:13,462 --> 01:27:15,898 I've got it all ready. I said I wanted to talk to you. 1137 01:27:15,964 --> 01:27:19,735 But, Dad, you just gotta. I've got it all written out for you. It's all ready. 1138 01:27:23,238 --> 01:27:26,975 Okay, Son. [ Muffled Applause ] 1139 01:27:30,078 --> 01:27:32,448 Once upon a time, it was snowing. 1140 01:27:34,149 --> 01:27:36,285 Raining? 1141 01:27:38,086 --> 01:27:40,589 And it rained some more. 1142 01:27:44,460 --> 01:27:46,695 And it kept on raining. This is a pretty dull story. 1143 01:27:52,401 --> 01:27:56,805 Now, there's a boat. Oh, I see. It's an ark. 1144 01:27:56,872 --> 01:27:59,508 Okay, Noah's ark and the flood. I get it. 1145 01:27:59,575 --> 01:28:02,311 Just 'cause you get the story doesn't mean you get the point. 1146 01:28:07,115 --> 01:28:09,318 Well, now the ark's finished. 1147 01:28:10,619 --> 01:28:13,055 And there's Noah. [ Joe ] Whoops. 1148 01:28:21,930 --> 01:28:25,634 [ Chorus ] ♪ Oh, the day that Noah finished the ark ♪ 1149 01:28:25,701 --> 01:28:27,770 ♪ It rained It poured ♪ 1150 01:28:27,836 --> 01:28:30,238 [ Bill ] All right, Noah had a big job ahead of him. 1151 01:28:30,305 --> 01:28:32,207 He had a whole new world to set up. 1152 01:28:32,274 --> 01:28:34,610 [ Men ] ♪ Oh, the bears ♪ [ Women ] ♪ The birdies ♪ 1153 01:28:34,677 --> 01:28:37,179 [ Together ] ♪ The lions and elephants came aboard ♪ 1154 01:28:37,245 --> 01:28:39,682 [ Joe ] Notice anything different about the animals? 1155 01:28:39,748 --> 01:28:42,150 [ Bill ] Yeah, they're two-by-two. 1156 01:28:42,217 --> 01:28:45,754 But their own mothers wouldn't recognize 'em. Anything else? 1157 01:28:45,821 --> 01:28:48,190 Some are wearin' pants. Some are wearin' skirts. 1158 01:28:48,256 --> 01:28:51,660 [ Chorus ] ♪ Hippity-potamus All went into the ark ♪ 1159 01:28:51,727 --> 01:28:53,996 You see this? Yeah. 1160 01:28:54,062 --> 01:28:56,475 Children could come along, but they weren't the important thing. 1161 01:28:56,499 --> 01:28:58,701 They were just extra until they grew up. 1162 01:28:58,767 --> 01:29:01,670 ♪ They all went into the ark for to get out of the rain ♪ 1163 01:29:01,737 --> 01:29:05,107 Now, here was the important thing, you see? You see? 1164 01:29:21,156 --> 01:29:25,160 Hello, Kitty? He got it. Yeah. 1165 01:29:25,227 --> 01:29:28,631 ♪♪ [ Jazz, Soft ] 1166 01:29:28,697 --> 01:29:31,033 Say, what happened to your glasses? 1167 01:29:31,099 --> 01:29:33,536 Contacts. Look at Jeannie. 1168 01:29:34,937 --> 01:29:37,973 Jeannie, for heaven's sake. What happened to you? 1169 01:29:38,040 --> 01:29:40,208 [ Woman ] Jeannie, what are you training for? 1170 01:29:40,275 --> 01:29:42,511 Excuse me. This is a formal party. 1171 01:29:50,285 --> 01:29:51,954 Bill! 1172 01:29:54,457 --> 01:29:57,860 I don't know how he got it or where he got it, but he got it. 1173 01:30:01,664 --> 01:30:05,468 ♪♪ [ "Girl Next Door" ] 1174 01:30:14,577 --> 01:30:19,347 ♪♪ [ Clang ] ♪ The guy's in love The gal's in love ♪ 1175 01:30:19,414 --> 01:30:22,217 ♪ In love, in love, in love ♪ 1176 01:30:22,284 --> 01:30:26,021 ♪ They're crazy with joy and it's plain to see ♪ 1177 01:30:26,088 --> 01:30:30,392 ♪ They will soon be more than just neighborly ♪ 1178 01:30:30,459 --> 01:30:32,995 ♪ Just let me look at that face ♪ 1179 01:30:33,061 --> 01:30:36,031 ♪ Oh, that face Oh, that fabulous face ♪ 1180 01:30:36,098 --> 01:30:40,235 ♪♪ [ Chorus Vocalizing ] ♪ For when I look at that grin ♪ 1181 01:30:40,302 --> 01:30:43,739 ♪ I go spinning ♪ ♪ And spinning and spinning and spinning ♪ 1182 01:30:43,806 --> 01:30:48,877 ♪ And spinning right out into space ♪ 1183 01:30:50,178 --> 01:30:55,150 ♪♪ [ Instrumental ] 1184 01:30:56,351 --> 01:30:59,922 Will you marry me someday? No. 1185 01:31:01,223 --> 01:31:03,158 Okay. 1186 01:31:03,225 --> 01:31:05,894 [ Chorus ] ♪ Tra-la-la-la-la Whoop-de-do ♪ 1187 01:31:05,961 --> 01:31:09,464 ♪ I will leap for joy like a kangaroo ♪ 1188 01:31:09,532 --> 01:31:12,568 ♪ I'm mad, I'm mad I'm crazy for ♪ 1189 01:31:12,635 --> 01:31:15,838 ♪ The girl next door to me ♪ 1190 01:31:15,904 --> 01:31:18,641 ♪ Someday she may wear a special smile ♪ 1191 01:31:18,707 --> 01:31:21,777 ♪ For a special walk down a special aisle ♪ 1192 01:31:21,844 --> 01:31:25,280 ♪ And I'll kiss the bride ♪ 1193 01:31:25,347 --> 01:31:28,316 ♪ When I stand by the side ♪ 1194 01:31:28,383 --> 01:31:36,892 ♪ Of the girl next door ♪♪